Tag Archives: pain

“You look great! Have you lost weight?” And other phrases on “What NOT to Say!”

HaveYouLostWeight.001-001

Want to start out with a trigger warning.  I’m going to be talking about illness-induced weight loss and our society’s often idiotic response to it.

Part of my recent health journey includes a little bit of illness-induced weight loss.  Some of it is explained by the fact that the pain and the pain killers made me not want to eat, and part of it as a result of some anemia that I’m facing.  Which has led a few nice, and well-intentioned people to remark and then ask, “You look great!  Have you lost weight?  How did you lose in?”  Now I know that they are trying to be kind, but it’s honestly kind of hard to keep the sarcastimonster in check.  Because the sarcastimonster wants to shout, “I do not look great, I look terrible.  I am a little thinner because I’m in excruciating pain and because my body is not processing food properly right now.  But thanks for the compliment.  If you’d like to try out my ‘Excruciating Pain Weight Loss Program’ (patent pending) I can arrange it for you.  Just come a LEETLE bit closer while I grab this hammer.”

Yup, the sarcastibeast gets a little, um, TESTY when I don’t feel so well.  But the sarcastibeast is right about one thing.  It’s always risky complementing somebody on their weight loss.  First of all, “You look great.” coupled with “Have you lost weight?” implies that before the person lost the weight, they didn’t look as great.  In fact, you’re saying before they probably didn’t look great at all.  Which is decidedly not cool.  Secondly, unless the person you’re talking to has been talking ad nauseum about their latest weight loss program you never know why they are losing weight.  If they have lost weight through deliberate weight loss, they are most likely going to gain that weight back again in the future.  And you just told them that the weight loss made them look great.  If they haven’t lost weight through deliberate means, they may have started smoking again or they may be grieving or they may have cancer.  And you’ve just told them that when they get better, they won’t look as great.  And their weight loss may not have been healthy at all.  I got a lot of compliments the last time I went through a major crazy weight loss program.  I was living on less than 1,000 calories a day.  My bowels no longer moved and my hair was falling out.  My menstrual cycle had stopped completely.  I was cold all the time.  I was very sick, and truth be told, I didn’t look that well at all.  Yet people complemented me all the time about how healthy I looked.

Complimenting somebody on weight loss may cause somebody who is already coping with something that is kinda a big deal to have to cope with something else.  They make come to see their illness-induced weight loss as a silver lining.  Think I’m kidding?  Joan Lunden has been battling a particularly aggressive form of cancer.  She even appeared, bald and smiling, on the cover of Time magazine.  (I’ll bet nobody said to her, “You look great!  Have you lost hair?”)  Last week, during a wonderful interview on the Today show about the challenges and lessons she’s experienced while coping with cancer, Joan started talking about the hidden “benefits” of cancer.  She mentioned how contemplating your own mortality tends to focus your life and help you see what’s important.  And then she leaned over to Hoda (who also has battled cancer) and smiled knowingly as she mentioned that since she started battling with cancer, she’s lost weight.  (Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.)  This reminds me of a friend of mine who admitted she has a whole closet full of clothes that don’t fit her.  She bought a whole bunch of clothes when she lost weight during chemotherapy.  And now that she’s well again, those clothes don’t fit.  But she doesn’t give those clothes away, because when she was wearing those clothes, during chemotherapy, people said, “You look great!  Have you lost weight?”  Which leads me to another point.

Saying “You look great!  Have you lost weight?” gives somebody who may be sick something else to worry about.  And something else to worry about is the last thing somebody needs when they are sick.  Because the sick person begins to wonder, what will happen when they get better and regain the weight?  What happens when they stop smoking for good or recover from the eating disorder?  What happens when they stop chemo and recover from cancer?  What happens when their red blood cells multiply and their body starts getting oxygen again?  What happens when they are no longer in pain and they start eating again?  What if all this wonderful stuff happens to their body and they start gaining weight?  Will they no longer look great?  It may even make the person wonder if getting better is such a good thing.

Which is patently ridiculous and extremely unhelpful.

On today’s episode of my new show, “What NOT to Say!” I’d like to make a suggestion.  As a society, we’ve learned that unless she’s wearing a t-shirt emblazoned with the words “baby on board” we’re never to ask a woman if she’s pregnant.  I’d like to suggest that commenting on a person’s weight loss should be in the same category.  It’s invasive.  It’s potentially risky.  It’s potentially rude.  And we just shouldn’t do it any more.

Love,

Jeanette DePatie, AKA The Fat Chick

P.S. Want me to speak about “What NOT to say about Weight Loss” to your group or organization?  Click here to BOOK ME.

P.S.S.  Want to join my mailing list and get FREE STUFF?  Click HERE.

Back

ScaryBack

Well I’m back here telling you that the pain in my back is, well, back.  Last week after I gave my speech at the Duarte Health Fair, I took a little nap and woke up in pain.  Like whoooooaaaa pain.  I went out for my birthday dinner.  Had a little pizza and went to bed.  When I woke up,  in the middle of the night I found I could barely walk.  I took some aspirin and cried and tried and tried to get comfortable.  After a long while, I found I could manage if I lay on my back with a pillow under my knees.  And until yesterday, that was about all I could do.  Whenever I moved from that spot, I was in agony.  Yesterday, I finally progressed to the point where I could sit upright so now I can write my blog.  And there was much rejoicing (yayyyy).

Why am I inviting you to this pity party?  I’m not really sure.  I do want to make it clear that I am not some kind of persona, but rather a person.  That means I get injured, I get sick, I get frustrated and I get discouraged sometimes, just like you.  And I do want to do a shout out to all of you who are in chronic pain.  This week, I had a teeny, tiny, appetizer, snack-sized reminder bite of what that is like and I have decreed, “It sucks.”  In the short space of a week, I’ve had to cancel many appointments and have a discussion with my husband that I wasn’t really able to do much to help him as I had to rest for half an hour after the giant effort of washing my hair.  I haven’t styled my hair for a week.  I can just about manage to stay clean.  I’ve had to call everybody to cancel my class–three times.  I had to explain to my doctor that while I was very clear that it would be better for me to get out of my bed and keep moving, I might use my laser-eyes power to kill him where he stood (if I had laser-eyes destruction capabilities).  I stood in Target, waiting for my prescription for pain killers to be filled, shifting from foot to foot, and hating the fact that I was asking them, please for the love of God, please hurry.  And this is just a teeny taste.  This is only one week.

I have been reminded yet again of all the people I know, all the students and family and friends who are suffering from chronic pain.  Friends that have been enduring for years and have no idea if or when their pain will ever end.  I have endured chronic pain for spurts throughout my life.  And it sucked.  And it crushed me in  my tracks and humbled me.  But I have enjoyed the privilege of not being in pain most of my life.  I honestly feel such respect for those who manage to endure month and year after year often while maintaining work, family, friendships, and maintaining the ability to think and to feel and even to laugh.  I give you mad props.  And the next time I ask a student in chronic pain to keep moving, that it will help them, I will give a silent prayer of gratitude that nobody really has killer, laser beam eyes.  Right? Well unless you are a cat that is:

Love,

Jeanette DePatie (AKA The Fat Chick)

P.S. Want to get free stuff? Join my list HERE.

For People who Hate Exercise

First and foremost let me tell you that it is completely within your rights to hate exercise.   It is also completely within your rights not to do any exercise at all.  You get to be the boss of you.  That means you are under no moral or social obligation to exercise or even think positively about it.

Personally, I’ve grown to love exercise and love what it does for me.  And I love to teach other people to exercise and to share my love for exercise with folks.  Some people will never love exercise or even like it.  And that’s okay.  But I think sometimes people who think they hate exercise, really only hate one aspect of exercise.  And sometimes (but not always) I have been able to help people move around, over, under or through those barriers to exercise and they find that they do really like exercise after all.

So if you hate exercise, but really wish you didn’t hate exercise, or at least could understand what all the fuss from all those happy exercisers is about, I have some thoughts to share with you.  Here are some of the most common exercise “hate points” I’ve discovered and some suggestions for how you might move around them if you like.

1.  I hate to sweat.  The first thing to understand is what about sweating do you hate?  Are you embarrassed about sweat?  Most great athletes sweat.  In fact, it’s a sign that your body is working in a healthy way.  Are you uncomfortable when you sweat?  If you have the means, you might consider buying some exercise clothes in technical, sweat-wicking fabrics.  Cotton (especially cotton socks) is uncomfortable when it gets wet and can lead to chafing.  Or maybe you want to exercise someplace cooler (see next point).

2.  I hate being hot.  First of all, I feel ya.  I also hate being hot.  But here again, there are some options. You can exercise in a highly air-conditioned space like the mall.  The mall is also usually quite flat, easy to navigate for people who have less control over their feet and usually (but not always) pretty safe.  Also, if you like to exercise outside, you can aim for early morning or evening.  Just be sure you are someplace relatively safe and have a charged cell phone with you at all times.  Also, swimming is a great exercise for people who like to stay warm.  But this leads to a whole other problem for some exercisers (see next point).

3.  Exercise messes up my hair.  I hear you.  Swimming or having hair that is soaked with sweat may initiate a whole hair care ritual that is absolutely no fun.  If this is you, I might suggest that you exercise first thing in the morning, and accept going to your workout with messy hair.  Then you can get coiffed just one time in the morning in the locker room after your workout rather than having to do your hair once per day.  Another option is to do your workout at the end of the day and wash your hair before bed time.  Depending on your style, perhaps you can just spray with water and style your hair in the morning.  I find that wearing a thin sweat band under my hair, helps keep my hair from getting too sweaty, but your experience may be different.

4.  Exercise is boring.   So many people try just one form of exercise, and when they don’t love it, they decide that exercise is no fun.  Finding the right form of exercise is like finding your prince or princess.  Sometimes ya gotta kiss a whole lot of frogs before you find the right one.  So don’t get married to the first form of exercise you try.  Experiment a little.  Go on some exercise dates.  And even when you find a form of exercise you love, you’ll still need to change things once in a while to spice things up.  Sometimes you need to do it in a different place.  Sometimes you need to try a different position.  And sometimes you just need to try something altogether different.

5.  I suck at exercise.  Here’s a secret.  I am very, very uncoordinated.  Sure, now I teach dance classes.  But it was really a challenge for me to learn the choreography and put together my routines.  Because most of us suck when we try something new.  And we suck at it until we do it a while and then we either suck at it less, or we actually get kinda of good at stuff.  But understanding the lot of the newbie and embracing beginnerness can help you not only in your exploration of fitness, but in other stuff as well.

6.  Exercise hurts.  This is an often complicated but important point about exercise.  A certain amount of soreness or stiffness is pretty normal when you exercise in a new way or with some muscles you haven’t used in a while.  This is called DOMS for Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness.  BUT exercise shouldn’t hurt a lot while you are doing it and it shouldn’t hurt a lot the next day.  The key here is to work very slowly and gradually beyond your current fitness level.  Depending on your current activity level this might mean moving very slowly.  Or maybe you are only going to work out for 5 or 10 minutes at a time.  That’s okay.  It doesn’t matter how little you start with.  Nobody even has to know what that is.  It matters that you aren’t in too much pain and that you are able to exercise again in a day or two.  If you are coping with serious or chronic pain,  you might need to work on some underlying issues with a physical therapist and eventually work with a trainer to develop a program.  But a lot of studies indicate that even people coping with chronic or serious pain eventually find pain relief from a properly constructed, reasonable exercise program.

There’s more to say, but I gotta go teach my dance class.  So for now we’ll say, “To be continued…”

Love, Jeanette DePatie (AKA The Fat Chick)

P.S. Wanna join my list and get free stuff?  Click HERE.

BACK (sorta)


 

Hello my dear readers.  As you may have noticed, I’ve been gone for a while.  Fortunately I had the opportunity to meet and speak with over 400 schoolteachers this past week and share the word about shame-free fitness and Health At Every Size for children.  It was wonderful, engaging and fun.  It was also a set of 7 grueling days with a very intense schedule.  Nevertheless I planned to continue blogging while away.

Alas, the universe had a different plan.  Shortly after I started at the conference, I reached for a piece of paper in my bag and something in the region of my lower back and right hip went completely out of whack.  My friends at the conference insist that it makes a better story that I hurt myself busting a move, that the limbo initiated my lumbago or SOMETHING.  But the truth is, I was sitting in a chair reaching for something in my bag, and I had that MOMENT.  There’s a moment when time stops and that surprising pain comes and all you can think is “WHOOOOOOAAAAA, that can’t be good!”.

I managed to fulfill all my obligations at the conference and even have some fun.  But sitting aggravated my pain the most and I simply couldn’t bring myself to blog last week.  Sorry about that.  But I thought I would take this moment to share a few thoughts with you about my back experience.

1.  Sometimes poop occurs.  It just does.  I could make myself crazy wondering if it was tension or a posture problem or lack of sleep or the size of my hips or the tilt of the universe that caused that pain.  But at the moment that the pain occurs I need not to focus on that.  I just need to deal with it.

2.  Dealing with it means that sometimes your plans have to change.  When pain or a serious setback happens, it’s time to reorganize priorities.  Some stuff will not get done.  You can either triage and choose which things you can do, or you can try to do everything and end up able to do nothing.  You wanna know how I know?  Experience.  So many times, I’ve been in denial about the fact that I can’t do everything.  So many times I’ve ended up at that point, in pain, completely spent, where I can’t do anything.  I really don’t want to do that any more.

3.  Pain is a sign that something is out of whack.  It could be posture.  It could be schedule.  It could simply mean something in my body isn’t working properly.  As I am healing this week, I will start, very gently to figure out what is out of whack.  I’ll see my doctor and start reviewing things in my life to see if I can figure it out.  But I may have to accept that the discovery process may be long and challenging.  And I may have to accept that I can never figure out exactly what caused this episode.

The good news is that hundreds of school teachers, councilors, administrators, and other employees were exposed to the notion of shame-free exercise and the Health At Every Size(TM) approach to wellness–many for the first time.  So I’m going to take an aspirin and take my leave glad for a job well (if shakily) done.

Love, Jeanette DePatie, AKA The Fat Chick

P.S.  Don’t forget about the Fat Activism Conference coming up soon. Click here to register for the Fat Activism Conference!

P.P.S.  Get access to free stuff!  Join my mailing list HERE.

Star Trek and the Two Minute Chair Workout

Best exercise chair EVAR!

One of the things I hear quite often on the Fit Fatties Forums or in emails is, “I can only do two minutes of exercise or I can only exercise in a chair.  Sometimes I feel like why bother.  I used to be able to exercise a lot and now I can just do this much.  I’m so embarrassed.”

First let me say, I feel ya.  Sometimes it seems like everyone around me is doing marathons or ultra-endurance events or walking for three whole days in a row for a cure.  Sometimes it seems like everywhere I look, somebody is dashing off an effortless 2 hour workout, glistening and smiling while climbing mountains, lifting huge weights and cycling the Great Wall of China.

And I have to remind myself to feel happy for them.  That it’s not kind or productive to feel jealousy or hatred towards them or to sit on them until they stop looking so athletic-y and agree to sit and watch re-runs of Game of Thrones with me.  And I have to remind myself that every athlete, and I mean every athlete had to start somewhere.  And every athlete has had setbacks that have made them slow down, go backwards in their training and build gradually back up.

I have had several major injuries, surgeries and illnesses over the years that have put my training on hold or brought it to a screaming halt.  I have had to go back to exercising one or two minutes at a time and gradually come back to a higher fitness level.  And you know what?  It kinda sucks.  It really kinda sucks to have to go backwards in your training and slow down and start again.  It kinda sucks to remember how easy exercise was when you were twenty and to feel what it’s like start up again at forty, fifty or eighty.

But you know what, we don’t all START as starship captains.  And starting is way better than dreaming about imagining the process of starting.  Two minute workouts are way, way better for your body than no workouts.  And exercise in a chair can be a safe and wonderful starting place if standing workouts aren’t comfortable or safe for you right now.  And if a two minute chair workout is something that you can do safely  and consistently and relatively comfortably at this point, then I would say that a two minute chair workout should ROCK YOUR WORLD RIGHT NOW!  And I’m going to let Captain Kirk and Spock tell you why.

If we look at this exercise thing with cold, Vulcan Spock-like logic, it’s fairly plain that one of the most important things is to live to exercise another day.  Now I don’t mean that you’re actually going to die after your workout (at least I hope not).   But it’s really, really common for beginning and returning exercisers to do way too much too soon.  If you’re lucky, you simply hurt all over the next day.  This does not inspire most of us to do another workout.  If you’re coping with a chronic illness or condition, you may find yourself so weak and exhausted that you can barely move the next day.  You may find that you have inadvertently used up a whole week’s worth of “spoons” in one go.  If you’re recovering from an injury, you may find that you have severely aggravated the injury site.  Or if you are even less lucky, you’ll re-injure yourself or have a brand new injury to deal with.  All in all, doing way too much too soon is not something to be proud of or wear as a badge of honor.  From a cold logic standpoint, it’s kinda stupid.

Because there is an alternative.  If you start small, at a level that is comfortable to you, and if you increase gradually, at a level that is safe and sensible, you don’t have to go through massive amounts of pain and injury and frustration.  You can progress in your fitness efforts without having to quit and go back to zero all the time.  You can spend a whole lot less time visiting your doctor or sports medicine specialist.  You can integrate exercise into your life without it taking over your life.  You can expend a reasonable amount of “spoons” on working out and still have some left for washing your hair and taking the kids to school.  Exercise will feel great and you will feel like doing more.  And if you ask your inner Spock, he’ll tell you that this is the smart move.

After that, you just have deal with your inner James T. Kirk.  First you have to tell your inner Captain that he needs to calm the heck down.  He will tell you to run out, phasers blasting, smart mouthing and fist fighting every sassy alien that comes along.  But let your inner Spock remind him of the need to live to fight another day.  Then let your inner Kirk remind you that you can cope with most things with a swagger and a smile–including a two minute chair workout.  Stubbornly refuse to be embarrassed by it.  Have fun with it.  Rock it out.  Gradually, increase.  And before you know it, you’ll be exercising more than you ever thought you could, feeling better and having a better quality of life.  And then you can truly, live long and prosper.

Love, Jeanette DePatie (AKA The Fat Chick)

P.S. Want to get free stuff, including a new bonus in July?  Join my mailing list HERE.

How do I know when I’m exercising hard enough?

kitty-yoga2

This question can be a bit difficult for beginners to navigate.  Given all the mixed messages we’ve heard about exercise from the notion that working out feels like being kissed by angels to the notion that all real exercise is accompanied by excruciating pain, it’s a little tough to know just how you should feel while working out.

As with most things,the truth is somewhere in the middle.  You should feel like you are expending some energy as you exercise.  At the same time, you should not be experiencing pain as you exercise either.  And the way you feel during exercise will also be impacted by what type of exercise you are doing, how familiar you are with that form of exercise and what fitness goals you are trying to achieve.  Let me give you a basic rundown based on exercise type.

new-years-resolutions-cats-treadmill-exercise

Aerobic Exercise:  During this form of exercise, the goal is to raise  your heart rate and sustain it at a slightly elevated level during your workout.  There’s lots of information available about what heart rate you should reach and not exceed.  But I find for most people, it is more helpful to use the “Rate of Perceived Exertion) or RPE to determine their appropriate exercise levels.  I like to use a tool I call the “sweat scale” to determine your RPE.  If you imagine a scale from 1 to 10, with 1 being how you feel when you are sitting on the sofa watching TV and eating cheezy poofs and 10 being how you feel when you are working out so hard you feel like somebody better call 911 because you are having a heart attack, we generally want to work out at between 6 and 8 on this scale to achieve maximum benefit from your workout.  This generally feels like you are working moderately hard.  You are breathing more deeply than usual, but not gasping for air.  You should be able to speak in short sentences, but you probably can’t sing while you are working at this level.  You are usually pretty sure you can keep exercising another 5 minutes at this level, but not sure you can work out another half hour or more.  Now you don’t have to work out at this level to be aerobic.  Any level over your normal resting level can count towards aerobic exercise.  But you generally don’t want to work out over this level for any sustained level of time.

One thing you’ll want to be very aware of as you exercise are any “warning signs” or what I call “dashboard indicators” from your body that let you know that something is wrong.  If you are unfamiliar with exercise “warning signs” please go here on my website and read the “Five Things You Should Know Before You Work Out” article.  It is really important to know this stuff, and it can save your life.

catstretch

Flexibility Training: This very important, but often overlooked type of exercise encompasses such practices as yoga and stretching.  Flexibility training not only makes it easier to move around, but also helps you avoid falls and prevent injuries in everyday life.  The key to flexibility exercise is to move your body to a point of gentle tension but not pain.  A good stretch feels a little bit like a yawn.  Your body reaches and expands, you feel a pleasant sense that you are moving your body a bit beyond it’s average range and you feel a gentle tug in your muscles.  Once again, this should not feel painful.  With this form of exercise, it’s particularly important to tune in and pay attention to the messages your body is giving you.  You may even wish to keep a journal and write down how various stretches feel to you, so you can get a sense of what works well for you in your practice.  Remember that in general you want to do static stretches, where you move your body into position and hold the stretch for ten to fifteen seconds.  Bouncing as you stretch or “ballistic stretching” can easily move your body outside of a good range of motion and lead to injury.

cat-exercise

Strength Training: Also called resistance training, this is where you use some sort of resistance to help build muscle mass and make you stronger.  This resistance can come in the form of weights (everything from dumbbells to water bottles), elastic bands (also called resistance bands), weight machines (including nautilus, and other cable systems) or even just the pull of gravity against your body (including things like crunches and squats).  Strength training is also a time when it is particularly important to tune into your body’s messages.  Good strength training should make you feel a gentle burn or warmth in your muscle.  It should be clear that your body is doing extra work, but you should not feel pain.  You also shouldn’t feel a sense of impending loss of muscle control.  If you are exercising alone and without a trainer, you probably don’t want to work your muscle to exhaustion, where your muscles begin to shake and it’s clear you can’t do one more rep.  That said, it’s quite normal for your muscles to feel tired after a certain number of reps.  Remember to check out that document on my website, and familiarize yourself with the exercise warning signs.

When you are first starting out, it’s pretty normal to feel some confusion about how hard you should be exercising.  This is a place where working with a personal trainer or group exercise instructor can really help.  Even if you can’t afford to work with a trainer for months on end, you could meet with a trainer for a few sessions, just to learn what your body can do and make sure you’ve gotten off to a good start.

But no matter how you approach it, remember to listen to your body and do what feels best for you.

Love, Jeanette (AKA The Fat Chick)

P.S. Looking for a little help?  How about joining my personal training program?  Prices are going to go up in January, so why not lock into some holiday savings right now?

P.P.S. Want to get access to FREE STUFF?  Just opt in RIGHT HERE!

Loving Your Body by Listening to Your Body

listening

I’ve been married for nearly 20 years, and that’s quite a while.  If I’ve learned anything over this past 20 years about relationships, it’s this–if you love somebody you have to take time to listen to them.  Sure, it’s important to buy each other presents, and show affection.  And yeah, sex is pretty important too.  But few things are as important as taking time to really hear what your partner has to say.

Today is Love Your Body Day, and I think that’s wonderful.  It’s a day which encourages us to celebrate the bodies we have as they are.  It’s a day which encourages us to put diets aside and to spend at least 24 hours not comparing ourselves to unrealistic media ideals of bodies and not beating ourselves up for failing to “measure up”.

But I think we can take this relationship with our bodies a little further than failing to beat ourselves up.  And I think one of the most important things we can do to show our bodies love is to learn to listen to them.

Our bodies are mysterious and magical and wondrous.  So much of it works without our having to think consciously about it at all.  Our hearts beat, and breathing happens.  Our stomachs digest food and our bodies break it into nutrients that fuel movements both conscious and unconscious.  But for things that we need to do consciously like find food and move our limbs, and lay down to sleep our bodies have a very sophisticated built-in wiring system intricately connected with our brains.  And if we become attuned to that wiring system, we can learn so much about what our bodies need.

So many of us have learned to be frustrated by the fact that our bodies get hungry.  But I for one, am deeply grateful for it.  I am a busy person who is easily distracted.  Were it not for hunger, I think I might find myself stranded on the side of the road somewhere completely out of fuel and without roadside assistance.  Luckily, I get hungry often and in no uncertain terms.  So even if I find it really annoying, I find that I have to take the time to find food on the regular.  What’s more, I find that if I take the time to listen, my body is pretty specific about what food it wants.  The more carefully I listen to my body, the more attuned I am to what nutrients I am lacking and what foods might best top off my nutritional tank.  Sometimes my body craves carrots and sometimes (well most of the time) it craves chocolate.  And it seems the more carefully that I follow my body’s menu choices (rather than my brain’s dictates about what I should eat) the better I feel.  And when I really listen to what my body wants to eat, and give in by eating precisely as much of those things as my body wants, I am rewarded.  My body feels warm, wonderful and satisfied.

Another area where I’m learning to finally listen to my loud-talking body is in movement.  Our bodies are capable of amazing abilities to move through space.  Not only can we walk across a room or catch a ball without thinking about it, but we can also hike and swim in the ocean and dance.  And this is another place where the highly sophisticated wiring in our bodies has a lot to tell us.  If I sit too long, my body protests.  My back and knees stiffen.  I feel pain in my head and neck.  On the other hand, if I move too much or too long or in a way that is too intense for my current fitness level, my body sends me messages of pain and fatigue.  Now just like hunger, pain and fatigue can be deeply annoying.  My schedule may convince my conscious mind that it does not want to get up and move or it may not want to stop moving or it may find it extremely inconvenient to sleep.  Thankfully, my body sends signals that are difficult to ignore and I try to find ways to meet my body’s demands by moving or resting or sleeping.  And when I get this right, my body rewards me.  I feel a lightness in my limbs and a glowing sense of energy when I am well-exercised and well rested.

Our bodies strive for something that is so difficult for us to achieve in modern life–balance.  Our bodies tell us when we are eating more food than we need or not enough.  Our bodies tell us when we need more broccoli, and when we need buns.  Our bodies tell us when to leap and when to laugh and when to rest and when to run.  And when I listen, truly listen, to my body, it sings.  The energy flows through me and I feel a hum that runs from my toes to the top of my head.  That’s what it feels like to be in a loving relationship with my body.  It feels wonderful. It’s enough to make me strive to make every day love my body day.

Love,

Jeanette (AKA The Fat Chick)

Stupid F@#!ing Injuries

Medic!

If you’ve done any sort of exercise for any length of time you’ve probably experienced some sort of pain or injury.  I know.  I feel ya.  I’ve experienced injuries of many shapes and sizes and they all, unequivocally suck.  But of all injuries I’ve faced, I have to admit that I’ve had the hardest time coping with the stupid f*$%ing injuries.

If you’re wondering what I mean, let me explain.  There are injuries that sound justified or even tough.  Like, “I got a stress fracture training for that Ironman race”.  Then there are stupid f##$ing injureis like, “I tripped over my own shoelace and now I’m going to be in traction for a month.”  It doesn’t sound sexy.  Nobody’s thinking, “wow what dedication and stuff, the guy walked in SHOES, with LACES.  And they came untied and he just KEPT GOING!”  Nobody is making YouTube videos with inspiring music behind them documenting your “tripping over your shoelaces” comeback.  Like I said, it just sucks.  Because as much as your knee or your back or your shoulder is hurting, you also have to deal with the agonizing blow to your pride.

I had a reminder of this just this past week.  I hurt my back, working on the remodel of our house.  Okay, that doesn’t sound too bad, right.  Oh, did I mention I was SWEEPING at the time?  Yup, all I was doing was sweeping and my external obliques let out a rebel yell:

OMG it was so embarassing.  My husband asked me what was wrong.  And I replied that I had just experienced the dumbest injury in history.  He told me to take some Advil and go lay down.  At first I told him, no–that I didn’t have time to lay down.  And in his infinite awesomeness he replied,

“Jeanette, tweaking your back is not the dumbest injury in history.  That kind of stuff happens to everybody.  But if you don’t take the time now to lay down and you make this worse and you allow a little injury to become a massive, got to lay in back for a week injury, now THAT would be pretty dumb.”

God, I love my husband–that is when I’m not trying to kill him for being annoyingly correct all the time.  But you know what?  He had a point.  I wish I could say that the injuries I suffered were some sort of sexy battle scars from the hard core exercise wars, but the truth is, the worst injuries I’ve ever had have been stupid !@#$ing injuries.  Including:

1.  Meniscus tear from jumping up on some exercise mats to get some exercise equipment for one of my classes.  Result: 4 weeks on crutches, massive physical therapy.

2. Torn ligament in the sole of my foot from catching my sandal on a single cement step at my parents house.  Result: 6 weeks on crutches, massive physical therapy.

3.  Tweaking my back from sweeping.  AAAAARGH!

Look there’s a point to all this and here it is.  We alllllllllll experience stupid f!$%ing injuries from time to time.  It happens to everybody.  Get over it.  The only thing that you can control is how you cope with it after it happens.  You can rest, get diagnosis, and get treatment OR you can ignore it and allow a small f#$%ing injury to become a MASSIVE f!#$%ing injury.  And as my husband says, that’s the dumbest kind of injury of all.

Hang in there!

Love,

Jeanette DePatie (AKA The Fat Chick)

P.S. Want to get access to FREE STUFF?  Just opt in RIGHT HERE!

When doctors are wrong.

drmistake

I recently watched this video–a TED talk–by Dr. Peter Attia. You may have seen it as it’s become quite a viral sensation over the last few weeks. But even if you have seen it, you might find it useful to watch again. So here it is:

While I don’t agree with absolutely everything Dr. Attia has to say, I do think he brings up a few important points.  One issue is that some doctors, scientists, and other medical professionals are really starting to question the causal nature of the link between obesity and diabetes.  I think this is an important area that will require a lot more study.  And I think it is our job to continue to push for this continued study.

But one issue that I want to particularly want to highlight here is how hard it seems to be for doctors to admit they are wrong.  Dr. Attia is clearly deeply moved.  He feels a tremendous sense of remorse for how he treated that poor woman with diabetes.  Once he realized the level to which he had allowed stigma to affect his treatment of this woman he was devastated.

Many of us would be quick to state, well he should be.  He may have deeply hurt this woman.  He may not have given her the best medical care.  Many of us don’t go to the doctor because we are so afraid of being hurt just this way at the doctor’s office or the hospital.  Some of us have died because of this.

To which I would respond, “Yes, that’s true.”

But I think it’s also important to see what this video has to teach us about doctors and what it might be like for them to understand that they were wrong about something.  We look to doctors to fix everything.  We ask them to make us well and to bring us back from the brink of death.  It takes a certain amount of arrogance to hold a person’s beating heart in your hand and endeavor to fix it.  And I imagine there is a certain amount of pain when you have to tell somebody or tell their family that you can’t fix it.  You can’t make it all better.  You are not god.  And I’m not sure that the pain ever goes away.

Please understand.  I am not making excuses for doctors who bully and stigmatize fat people.  It is wrong, and it needs to stop.  Now.  That is why I am working so closely with the Size Diversity Task Force and the Association for Size Diversity And Health on the Resolved project.  We need to share our stories.  We need doctors and the public to understand that weight stigma is extremely damaging to fat people in medical settings and is sometimes even fatal.  There was a period of years in my life when I was quite sick and might have died based on the assumptions that doctors had made about me.  So I get it.  This must change.

But I think, if we want our work to be effective, if we want things to change, we need to be perceptive and understand what it means to help doctors understand that they are wrong about this.  We need to understand this–not so we can let them off the hook–not so we can let them down easy– so we can find the best path towards an actual solution, so we can understand why many doctors are so resistant, and so we can better understand why this is taking so long.

The issue of weight stigma in medicine is complex and nuanced.  But I do know one thing.  It will only change if a lot of us continue to work together to bring about change.  I would love to hear your thoughts about this issue.  And I would love to have your continued support to make the Resolved project a success!  Click here for more information about how you can participate.

Love,

The Fat Chick

Like my posts?  You’ll love my stuff!

Buy my book: The Fat Chick Works Out! (Fitness that is Fun and Feasible for Folks of All Ages, Shapes Sizes and Abilities)–available in softcover and e-book versions

Buy my DVD: The Fat Chick Works Out! (A Safe, Easy and Fun Workout for Klutzes, Wimps and Absolute Beginners!)

Buy a book or a DVD for a friend and save $5!  Just enter FRIENDBLFT in the discount code box!

Check out my Training Programs–both in person and via Skype (Starting at just $25!)

or

Book me to speak at your special event!