Tag Archives: joy

Thursday Theater: With a Thankful Heart

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Good morning my dear Chicklettes! This Thanksgiving I am grateful for so many things! And, in addition to my wonderful heart, I am especially grateful for the amazing and wonderful gift of my whole mind and my entire body:

  • Feet that step and skip and dance,
  • Legs that have carried me towards my loved ones and all that I dream,
  • Knees that flex under the load I sometimes have to carry, and kneel in awe of the beauty of this world,
  • Thighs that make a lap for holding warm, squirmy, squiggly children and a resting place for the chin of my fabulous dog, Max,
  • Hips that sway and shimmy and shake to the beat of the beautiful old earth, and make a place to rest my hands when arms akimbo, I face the dangers and toils of this world,
  • A round, soft bottom that cushions me when I fall,
  • A warm, generous tummy that creates the energy I need to live and love and shakes merrily when I giggle and gufflaw at the delicious absurdity of life,
  • A broad back that allows me to bend down to help others and help shoulder their load,
  • An expansive chest that swells when I breathe the rich and wonderful air, that powers my speech and my song, that gives me a place to cradle that which is beloved,
  • A powerful neck that allows me to turn my head and see not only that which is right in front of my eyes, but all of the wonder that surrounds me,
  • Lips to kiss,
  • Tongue to taste,
  • Teeth to bite when the need arises,
  • Eyes that convey the beauty of the universe to my mind and allow others to see into my soul,
  • Ears that record the music of the earth from the soft shushing of the surf to the boom of a storm to the whisper of a lover sharing a secret,
  • And a heart and mind capable of recognizing the incomprehensible nature of the gift which I have received.

Here’s hoping that Thanksgiving is full of all that makes you happy and joyfully devoid of the stuff that tempts you to choose to relinquish your peace.

Love,

The Fat Chick

The unparalelled power of owning your beauty

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Today I was privileged to read this powerful post from a woman speaking about how she chose to call herself beautiful in front of her daughters.  She understands the power of claiming, unconditionally, that she is beautiful in front of her kids.  She spoke of how it must have seemed confusing for her young offspring in the past, when they thought her beautiful, but she negated that reality.

She says:

How confusing it must have been to have me say to them, “You think I am beautiful, but you are wrong. You are small and you love me, so you’re not smart enough to know how unattractive I am. I know I am ugly because I see myself with mean eyes. You are my child and I love you, but I will not allow myself to be pretty, for you.

What a profound thing this is.–to understand the power we gain not only for ourselves, but also for all who love us, when we claim our power to be beautiful.  When we cast false modesty aside and inhabit our glorious, gorgeous selves we do more than make ourselves feel better.  We also create space for others to feel beautiful.  We wrest control from media outlets and glossy glamour magazines, over the definition of fabulous.  We teach our children that beauty comes in an unending variety of sizes, shapes, colors and types.  We cast aside the fear that we will never again be worthy of adoration–that we will never again be enough to make someone gasp at our audacity and amazing selves.  And we prevent that fear from tainting the lives of our children.  We own the definition of ravishing and rapturous and we choose to apply it to ourselves.  And once we’ve applied those labels to ourselves, who would dare, WHO WOULD DARE take it from  us?

I find this concept endlessly exciting.  The notion that claiming our power encourages other women to do the same.  And that making acceptance of ourselves unconditional before our children, we teach them to love themselves forever, rather than for the short time they are young, thin, unblemished, untarnished and inexperienced.  What a spectacular and lasting legacy!

So my dear friends.  What would happen for you if you cast off the need to be modest and demure?  How profound is the impact of accepting yourself unconditionally and forever, just as you are?  And just how large is the gift to those who come behind, when you model this calm, confident and peaceful contentment on a day to day basis?

Love thyself, and change the world!

Love,

The Fat Chick

Thursday Theater: Joy in the Dance with Helen Keller

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For this Thursday Theater, I wanted to share this amazing video featuring Helen Keller and Martha Graham.  Apparently when these two women met, they recognized that they were kindred spirits.  Martha Graham was immediately taken by Helen’s ‘gracious embrace of life’.  And indeed, Helen’s joy at experiencing the dance in her own unique way is palpable.

You can read a lot more about the meeting here, including a very wonderful story about Helen learning the meaning of the word “jump”.  Apparently while experiencing the dance, Helen asked what the word “jump” meant.  Martha Graham called one of the dancers over and placed Helen’s hands gently on his waist.  He then jumped in the air several times.  Helen was so excited as she now understood the full meaning of this word.  She experienced the freedom that comes when a body leaves the earth.  “How like thought, how like the mind it is!” she exclaimed.

I played Helen Keller in a theatrical version of The Miracle Worker when I was in high school.  Ever since then, she has been an important influence in my life.   I find this video especially moving for two reasons.  First, I think it shows that dance is a very powerful form of communication that breaks through many barriers.  And second, I think it shows how wonderful it is that each of us can experience joy in a way that is personal and unique.  I love watching Helen’s face in the video and watching the abandon with which she experiences life.  It’s something that I would like to aspire to one day.  I find it deeply inspiring and hope you do too.

Love,

The Fat Chick

Filling the Barns

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We had the house tented for termites this past weekend.  This is a rite of passage that nearly all Southern California folks go through at some point in their lives, and it is a big pain in the tuckus.  We had to be out of the house for several days and we had to spend many hours prepping the house for the process.  Frankly we were dreading the whole thing.  We had researched some hotels in town that could accommodate us and our dog and we were frankly less than thrilled with the options.

Then my awesome husband came up with a brilliant idea.  “Let’s go camping!” he said.  I was skeptical.  I was waiting to hear back from a show producer.  I had piles and piles of work to do and I knew the campground didn’t have wi-fi.  How could I realistically take the weekend off?  I also wasn’t sure that prepping to live in a tent while we were prepping to tent the house seemed like such a good idea, but I agreed.  And getting ready for the trip was kind of tough with everything else going on, but boy am I ever glad we did.

We finally had just a breath of fall.  It was so nice to don a light jacket at night and to live without the whirr of the AC for a few days.  The weather was frankly, perfect.  Warm, sunny, clear and gorgeous.  We spent a lot of time doing nothing.  We walked.  We talked.  We looked at trees. We tasted apple cider.  We played with the dog.

This was definitely a lemons to lemonade situation here.  I had been wanting to take some time off, but just felt that I couldn’t.  I was clearly tense, frustrated and completely out of energy.  But somehow I felt I needed to keep slogging.  I was trying to keep the farm running and the livestock fed with an empty barn.

It was just a reminder that sometimes you have to stop and fill the barn.  Sometimes you have to quit waving the pitchfork around and you need to go get some hay.  Sometimes you’ve got to refuel.

Sure, I took almost a whole weekend off.  (I still took a producer call on Friday night and taught class Saturday morning.)  And you know what?  The world kept on turning.  I remembered that I have a family who loves me.  And I am ready to face that huge pile of stuff to do again with renewed energy and purpose.

I’m remembering again that I am one very lucky fat chick!

Love,

The Fat Chick

Why does doing good sometimes feel so bad?

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In yesterday’s post, I shared with you a glowing report about an amazingly awesome activism event–Take Back the Beach.  It was powerful and wonderful and moving.  It was a  special and discrete moment in time where things went well, everyone got along, and changing the world seemed not only possible, but inevitable.

And then I came back home to my email inbox. And that mailbox was filled with the real-life frustrations that come when many people within many groups try to make the world a better place.  Along with the magic moments of transcendence and transformation come many days of messy arguments over who holds what power and who is making the rules and who is following the rules and who gets the credit, and who gets to speak and who is heard.  Sometimes it’s really hard to hold the thread and keep the focus.  It’s easy to forget that it’s really about making the world a better place.

I wish I could say this experience is unique to one group, but I’ve experienced it in so many places and with so many organizations.  Sometimes it’s tempting to go off into a corner and just try to do activism all by yourself.  But that doesn’t work either.  To make change you need a lot of people, all working at the top of their game, all sharing to the best of their abilities.  Everyone needs to be valued.  Everyone needs to be recognized.  And each and every time, you have to realize that there is no group of people, anywhere in the world that is going to get it right all the time.  People are fallible and relationships are messy.  We are all by turns proud, defeated, aggressor, and victim.  All you can do is try to build groups with enough strength and elasticity to bend and not break when the wind blows through.  And then you try again.  And then you try again some more.  Wash, rinse and repeat.

That’s why it’s so helpful to have those special moments in the sun, like Take Back the Beach.  It helps me so much to have these memories to treasure and hold close and remember why the heck we’re doing this in the first place.

My little Chicklettes, please remember that the road to making the world a better place is never a smooth one.  Sometimes reaching a wing out to help somebody else simply results in two feathery butts bouncing on the ground.  But sometimes you and the entire flock will soar!  Here’s to remembering your days of high flying.

Love,

The Fat Chick

Taking Back the Beach

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Well kids, it’s been a video kinda week. But I wanted to share this amazing skit I created with my LA Rad Fatty Friends. It was super fun! Here’s the text in case you have trouble making out even one word of the awesomeness!

East of the ocean and south of the bay
Lies the land where NAAFALANs frolic and play
On playgrounds and beaches and all public spaces
With joy in their hearts and smiles on their faces.

Today, the NAAFALAns swarmed on the beach
With a spring in their hair and a song in their speech.
They gathered with skips, with giggles, with squeals.
Our own gnomie even sped on four wheels.

In swimsuits, trunks, muumuus, bikinis:
They gathered around to swim and roast weenies.
Finally came the fat rainbows twins —
Indistinguishable to all but very close friends.

Every NAFFALAN creature liked swimming a lot
But Sue, not a NAFFALAN, felt she could not.
Sure, Sue loved swimming: the splashing, the hats.
But didn’t, for the MeMes had called her too fat.

It could be the MeMes were hungry and dizzy
And that’s why they spouted such hate on the TVs.
No matter the reason, no MeMe would rest
Till all fatty bodies stayed inside and dressed.

With all of her belly, our girl loved to swim,
She wanted to splash with the hers and the hims.
Watching the NAAFALANS, she wanted to play
But the MeMes on TVs said, “Nay! Nay! And NAY!”

“You’re much too big, too threatening, too gaudy.
Please spare us the sight of your fat, happy body!
If you’re looking for fun, just do what I do:
Wear a super tight girdle and chug low-carb goo.”

Our girl sat back down, convinced to stay put
When suddenly, something rolled onto her foot.
The NAAFALANS had lost their big round beach ball.
It was curvy and bouncy and fun like them all.

“Hey,” said one NAAFALAN, who’d come for the toy,
“Wanna play at the beach with us fat girls and boys?
We’ve munchies and swimming and games that we play.
We’re a size-diverse group we call NAAFA-LA.”

Well, Sue stood up cautiously, looking around,
Then the MeMes on TVs yelled, “Sit yourself down!
Can you bear all the staring, the whispers, the looks?
Better stay in your parlor and just read a good book.”

All of the NAAFALANS sat there and happily giggled.
They patted their tummies and watched while they jiggled.
“If you want to go swimming,” they said with a smile.
“Fight and unite with us, do it with style.

“Your body’s a temple, deserving of praise.
Feed it and move it in all kinds of fun ways.
Show off its beauty, adorn it with pride.
This is no time to cower or shiver or hide!

They skipped to the beach, hand in plump hand,
To nibble and frolic and play on the sand.
Sue took a deep breath and, taking a chance,
Joined with the NAAFALANS in a beach party dance.

[Dance break]

The Memes went crazy and just kept on screaming
“After all that we’ve told you, the nagging and scheming,
You choose to defy us and put on display
Your tummies, and thighs and arms as you play?

“You bet!” all the NAAFALANS shouted with glee
“Your words no longer have power over me.
We’ll laugh as you yell and smile while you preach,
Because the NAAFALANS, my dear, just took back the beach!”

Love,
The Fat Chick