Taking Back the Beach

Well kids, it’s been a video kinda week. But I wanted to share this amazing skit I created with my LA Rad Fatty Friends. It was super fun! Here’s the text in case you have trouble making out even one word of the awesomeness!

East of the ocean and south of the bay
Lies the land where NAAFALANs frolic and play
On playgrounds and beaches and all public spaces
With joy in their hearts and smiles on their faces.

Today, the NAAFALAns swarmed on the beach
With a spring in their hair and a song in their speech.
They gathered with skips, with giggles, with squeals.
Our own gnomie even sped on four wheels.

In swimsuits, trunks, muumuus, bikinis:
They gathered around to swim and roast weenies.
Finally came the fat rainbows twins —
Indistinguishable to all but very close friends.

Every NAFFALAN creature liked swimming a lot
But Sue, not a NAFFALAN, felt she could not.
Sure, Sue loved swimming: the splashing, the hats.
But didn’t, for the MeMes had called her too fat.

It could be the MeMes were hungry and dizzy
And that’s why they spouted such hate on the TVs.
No matter the reason, no MeMe would rest
Till all fatty bodies stayed inside and dressed.

With all of her belly, our girl loved to swim,
She wanted to splash with the hers and the hims.
Watching the NAAFALANS, she wanted to play
But the MeMes on TVs said, “Nay! Nay! And NAY!”

“You’re much too big, too threatening, too gaudy.
Please spare us the sight of your fat, happy body!
If you’re looking for fun, just do what I do:
Wear a super tight girdle and chug low-carb goo.”

Our girl sat back down, convinced to stay put
When suddenly, something rolled onto her foot.
The NAAFALANS had lost their big round beach ball.
It was curvy and bouncy and fun like them all.

“Hey,” said one NAAFALAN, who’d come for the toy,
“Wanna play at the beach with us fat girls and boys?
We’ve munchies and swimming and games that we play.
We’re a size-diverse group we call NAAFA-LA.”

Well, Sue stood up cautiously, looking around,
Then the MeMes on TVs yelled, “Sit yourself down!
Can you bear all the staring, the whispers, the looks?
Better stay in your parlor and just read a good book.”

All of the NAAFALANS sat there and happily giggled.
They patted their tummies and watched while they jiggled.
“If you want to go swimming,” they said with a smile.
“Fight and unite with us, do it with style.

“Your body’s a temple, deserving of praise.
Feed it and move it in all kinds of fun ways.
Show off its beauty, adorn it with pride.
This is no time to cower or shiver or hide!

They skipped to the beach, hand in plump hand,
To nibble and frolic and play on the sand.
Sue took a deep breath and, taking a chance,
Joined with the NAAFALANS in a beach party dance.

[Dance break]

The Memes went crazy and just kept on screaming
“After all that we’ve told you, the nagging and scheming,
You choose to defy us and put on display
Your tummies, and thighs and arms as you play?

“You bet!” all the NAAFALANS shouted with glee
“Your words no longer have power over me.
We’ll laugh as you yell and smile while you preach,
Because the NAAFALANS, my dear, just took back the beach!”

Love,
The Fat Chick

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