Tag Archives: gorgeous

How to Have a Movie Star Body (It’s not what you think…)

In a recent interview, Elizabeth Banks dared to step outside of the common, “I look like a movie star because of my alfalfa smoothies, my personal trainer and my guru” rhetoric to admit that she really can’t take that much credit for her gorgeous body.

In a recent interview in New You Magazine Banks said:

I didn’t quite believe I was pretty for a long time. I never thought about it. I’m very genetically blessed, I cannot deny it, but I work hard at keeping myself together. Yes, I have nice cheekbones and skinny legs but I can’t take any credit for it.

As Lily Carlin points out in her recent Huff Po article on the topic, this is very, very refreshing. Typically lean and leggy celebrities, or at least their publicists insist that the actresses get this way because of their special diet (paleo, vegan, clean foods, air–with accompanying celebrity recipe book $29.95), special exercise routine (pilates, yoga, dance, calisthetics–with accompanying exercise DVDs $19.95 each) and special spiritual routine (with accompanying spirit book, diary or retreat with guru $1499 and up).

I think this is one of the great lies of the fitness industry. There are an awful lot of genetically gifted folks out there some of whom were born on third and think they hit a triple. Some, like Elizabeth Banks understand that there is a strong genetic component to their conventionally good looks and are grateful and circumspect. But there are also plenty of folks out there who are convinced that everybody could be as thin and gorgeous as them if they only tried.

Now don’t get me wrong. I know that many movie stars take a great amount of time and energy to “maintain” their looks. They exercise a lot. They eat in a very prescribed way. And no doubt this energy has some effect on how they look.

But the reality is, we are not all starting from an equal place. So I could put in as much or even twice as much energy as them and not end up looking like them. I am not genetically gifted in that way. For one thing, I’d need to grow about 6 inches taller, and I don’t really see that happening. Let me explain it this way.

Usain Bolt is a great runner. Michael Phelps is a great swimmer. I am a naturally gifted singer with over three octaves of range and at one time, a fairly reliable high “F”. I can put just as many hours of running in as Bolt and I will never run like him. I don’t have the right kind of body for that. I could swim 6 or 8 hours per day and never swim like Michael Phelps. And I’m pretty sure that both of these guys could take 2 hours of singing lessons per day and never achieve a high “F”. Their bodies are not designed for it.

Does that mean I should give up swimming or running? Does that mean these fellas shouldn’t even sing “Happy Birthday”? OF COURSE NOT! But it does mean that we need to adjust what we see as “success” in each of these situations. I like to walk and run. But I am under no delusions that I will run like Bolt. I love to swim. But I will never swim like Phelps. So I define success in these areas in a way that feels right and natural to me and my body. When I do a 5K, I feel pretty good. I don’t worry too much about my time. And if I swim some laps and take a water aerobics class, I feel pretty good. I don’t worry that much about how fast I did it or even how far I went.

Most of us can accept that we will not be Olympic athletes when we exercise. So why is it that we believe that exercise and a special diet will make us look like a movie star? Why are we still looking at those articles touting 3 simple moves that will make us look like Julia Roberts. There are really only a few simple moves that are likely to get us there: 1) Encourage movie star’s mom and movie star’s dad to get it on. 2) Watch movie star mom get pregnant with us. 3) Win genetic lottery (maybe).

Check out this video:

See what I mean? So am I saying why bother? Am I suggesting there is no point to exercising and eating well? I think you know me well enough by now to understand that I will suggest no such thing. While you are the boss of you and under no moral, ethical or other obligation to eat well and exercise, I think that eating well and exercising are kind of awesome things. I think there are many, many benefits to both. However, I think those benefits are unlikely to contain a movie star body for most of us. And I think getting real about those expectations can help us enjoy our food and have a lot more fun exercising going forward.

Love, Jeanette DePatie (AKA The Fat Chick)

P.S. The Size Activism Conference is coming up SOON! Don’t miss it! Click here to register:

The unparalelled power of owning your beauty

Leave a reply

Today I was privileged to read this powerful post from a woman speaking about how she chose to call herself beautiful in front of her daughters. She understands the power of claiming, unconditionally, that she is beautiful in front of her kids. She spoke of how it must have seemed confusing for her young offspring in the past, when they thought her beautiful, but she negated that reality.

She says:

How confusing it must have been to have me say to them, “You think I am beautiful, but you are wrong. You are small and you love me, so you’re not smart enough to know how unattractive I am. I know I am ugly because I see myself with mean eyes. You are my child and I love you, but I will not allow myself to be pretty, for you.

What a profound thing this is.–to understand the power we gain not only for ourselves, but also for all who love us, when we claim our power to be beautiful. When we cast false modesty aside and inhabit our glorious, gorgeous selves we do more than make ourselves feel better. We also create space for others to feel beautiful. We wrest control from media outlets and glossy glamour magazines, over the definition of fabulous. We teach our children that beauty comes in an unending variety of sizes, shapes, colors and types. We cast aside the fear that we will never again be worthy of adoration–that we will never again be enough to make someone gasp at our audacity and amazing selves. And we prevent that fear from tainting the lives of our children. We own the definition of ravishing and rapturous and we choose to apply it to ourselves. And once we’ve applied those labels to ourselves, who would dare, WHO WOULD DARE take it from us?

I find this concept endlessly exciting. The notion that claiming our power encourages other women to do the same. And that making acceptance of ourselves unconditional before our children, we teach them to love themselves forever, rather than for the short time they are young, thin, unblemished, untarnished and inexperienced. What a spectacular and lasting legacy!

So my dear friends. What would happen for you if you cast off the need to be modest and demure? How profound is the impact of accepting yourself unconditionally and forever, just as you are? And just how large is the gift to those who come behind, when you model this calm, confident and peaceful contentment on a day to day basis?

Love thyself, and change the world!

Love,

The Fat Chick

Big Girls on the Red Carpet

3 Replies

Jeanette working the Red Carpet with the two directors of the Haute Curves Fashion Show for LA Fashion Week: Angela Rene’ AKA “The Purple Diva”, CEO of PurpleDivaDesigns.com and Jasmine Epperson, CEO at Kris Eliza Boutique

On the list of things we big girls are told we will never experience, you can add wearing beautiful clothes. As a kid, I never thought I’d get to wear gorgeous things and the idea that there would be plus-sized models seemed extremely remote.

So in my week of saying “neener, neener, neener” to the list of stuff we fluffy folk “shouldn’t expect to enjoy,” I’m telling you that the models ROCKED THE HOUSE at this past weekend’s Haute Curves fashion show for LA Fashion Week. For over two hours we watched unbelievably gorgeous men and women of all sizes, small to super-sized, strut down the runway in some extremely gorgeous clothes. And folks, these were not your mama’s muumuus. There was an awful lot of extremely beautiful clothes from delightfully weird to sporty to super sexy on that runway. Angela and Rene put on an absolutely spectacular event!

The Fat Chick near the runway at the Haute Curves fashion show.

So besides the need to feed my considerable ego by showing you pictures of the cool thing I got to do on Saturday night, why am I sharing this with you? I think it’s important to bust myths about what people of size can expect for their lives. I know for me, the panic over the things I thought I would miss as a plus-sized woman, like true love and a kickin’ black leather skirt I could wear, once filled me with feelings of panic. And I think in some cases our loved ones (especially our parents) are unduly fearful of the things we will miss out on or can’t have if our bodies are larger than societal ideals.

It took several decades, but I now realize that there is virtually nothing completely unavailable to me as a person of size. (Well maybe a comfortable coach-class airplane seat, but I’m not sure ANYBODY feels comfortable in one of those.) And it has taken several decades, but those who love me most have come to realize that I can do all that I want and have all that I dreamed of without losing 100 pounds first. And let me share with you, it has been an absolute blessing and a joy for all of us to just calm the heck down about the whole thing.

Yes Virginia, there is a Sexy Santa Claus costume just for you. There’s even a fabulous black leather skirt in your size, just waiting for you to claim it.

Love,

The Fat Chick