Tag Archives: scared

Too Sexy for our Shirts? Cleavage, morality and discrimination in America

BBIP

Not all big girls have big cleavage.  But some of us do. And when we dare to reveal them in public, look out!  The morality police may just be on the way.  This week we’ve had yet another attack of B-BIP or Big Boobs In Public.  And while the world seems extremely tolerant of T-TIP (Tiny Titties in Public) B-BIP tend to fuel a stampede of blanket and towel wielding, hand wringing panic stricken people eager to cover those bad boys up.

Long ago, Elvira proved that Big Boobs in Public can be TERRIFYING!

Long ago, Elvira proved that Big Boobs in Public can be TERRIFYING!

Now here’s the thing.  Larger breasts make more cleavage.  So even if you cover the same amount of breast with a swimsuit top or a bra or a dress, it won’t look quite the same on a bigger rack.  And whether it’s the sheer size of those magnificent orbs or the fabric straining, engineering defying potential of them, B-BIP freak people right the f@#$ out.

Here are a few case histories.  Just this week a woman was kicked out of a water park in Independence, Missouri for wearing a string bikini.

Madelyn-Sheaffer

Madelyn Sheaffer insists that plenty of other women were dressed in a similar manner but weren’t asked to leave or cover up.  She suggests that those women were both younger and skinnier.  And I have to confess, having been to a lot of water parks in Missouri, that this is likely to be true.  I’ve seen many skinny young things at water parks dressed in a similar manner.  But this woman presents a triple threat to American eyeballs.  She presents ECO B-BIP (Extremely Confident Older Big Boobs In Public).  OMGWTFBBQ!  She gives young people the idea that older people can still feel sexy!  She presents the notion that you don’t have to be stick thin to feel good in your body!  She’s got impressive ink on her torso!  Look away Johnny.  Just. Look. Away.

And B-BIP don’t just go to water parks.  They also try to go to prom.  Oh the horror!  Brittany Minder apparently terrified prom officials when she clad her B-BIP in a gorgeous, strapless, purple gown and tried to go to the big dance.

brittanyMinder

Now granted, there was a dress code in place, and Brittany even had to sign an agreement stipulating that she would abide by the dress code at the prom.  But Mindy and her most cool and righteous parents suggest that the dress code is not applied evenly.  They suggest that Brittany was forced to cover up at prom not because her dress was skimpier than many others who appeared at the prom, but simply because her chest was bigger.  Brittany’s mom offers this stunning and simple defense for her daughter’s B-BIP:

“All women are not created equal, and you can not compare a golf ball to a grapefruit. It ain’t gonna happen,” Kim Minder said.

B-BIP even terrify television executives.   A while back, Lane Bryant created an ad for its new line of lingerie.

Apparently both Fox and ABC refused to air the ad–claiming that the “plus-sized cleavage is too prominent”.  These networks both regularly air Victoria’s Secret ads featuring models in the same amount of clothing or even less.  There’s nothing offensive about the ad, unless you just can’t handle B-BIP:

This is much ado about much, says Peggy Wang in Buzzfeed: “There’s nothing too scandalous” in the ad — unless, of course, “giant boobs scare you.”

But that’s the thing.  Clearly giant boobs do scare us.  So I’m dying to know what you think my gentle readers.  Should we carefully cover and camouflage our BBIP you know cuz’ of teh children?  Or should we wear ’em out high and proud?  I’d love to hear your thoughts!  Meanwhile, I’m taking my B-BIP to exercise class.  Gotta bounce!

Love,

The Fat Chick

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The Fat Chick on Hallmark’s Home and Family

HomeandFamilyHi Everybody!

At long last, I’ve gotten a copy of my appearance on Hallmark’s “Home and Family” Show.  It’s pretty light-hearted, but I got the chance to say some important things.  I hope you like it.

I think it’s fair to say that I was terrified about this appearance.  I actually was in several other segments of the show as a guest.  The producers grilled me at length before booking me.  In fact, I remember that the call came in during a camping trip that I shared with my husband.  Thankfully he’s super understanding so I was able to take this call even while we were on vacation.  This is something that is generally a taboo for us.

But I learned one interesting thing from this show.  And that is I think the interviewers were as nervous as I was about covering this topic.  This is a “nice” show with “nice” hosts.  This was no Jerry Springer.  And I could tell they were struggling with how to cover this topic and meet the requirements of their producers without looking mean or stupid.  When I was able to handle the questions without crying or freaking out or being accusatory, they were visibly relieved.  And for me, that’s something important to remember.  When you’re talking to somebody who is aggressive and mean, it’s important to be able to deal with that.  But it’s also important to be able to help somebody along who has absolutely no idea about how to talk about this important topic.

Anyways.  I’m on the road and frantically getting ready for the ASDAH conference.  I hope to see some of you there!

Love,

The Fat Chick

The Right Now Show Episode 009: Finding Support!

In episode 009 of The Right Now Show Jeanette DePatie (AKA The Fat Chick) shares some tips for finding support in your journey towards loving the skin you’re in and assures you that you’ll get by with a little help from your friends!

Here are some additional resources:

Size Diversity Task Force
Association for Size Diversity and Health
Fit Fatties Forum

Fat Chick Sings Blog
Dances With Fat Blog
The Fat Chick Clique
Live Streamed Classes

The Courage to Try

dance_pictureIn putting together my new college “Love Your Body” speech and in reading Ragen Chastain’s awesome blog post, one thing has been coming up over and over again.  That thing is how being uncomfortable with our bodies tends to rob us of our ability to reach our full potential.  Ragen talks at length about how many people in our society react with genuine surprise when they encounter a fat person with talent.  I have to admit, it’s really got me thinking.

I think any time a person performs in public or even simply raises their hand in class or is willing to take a definite side in a public debate, it takes a lot of courage.  Anyone putting themselves out in this way is open to somebody calling them out, calling them names or simply laughing at them.  As a fat person, simply walking down the street can be enough to fuel criticism, catcalling or cruelty.  Is it any wonder then, that many fat people don’t want to call additional attention to themselves by raising their hand, taking part in a debate or getting up in front of an audience to dance, recite poetry, act or sing?

Lately it seems everywhere we turn we see talented people being publicly ridiculed for their weight.  Recently, star actress Melissa McCarthy was skewered by film critic Rex Reed, not for her performance, but rather for being a “cacophonous, tractor-sized, female hippo…who has devoted her short career to being obese and obnoxious with equal success…”  This woman, with her “short acting career” spanning a mere 17 years, currently stars in a hit prime-time network television show and a movie that opened number one at the box office, has been nominated for over 15 major awards including an Oscar and boasts a Prime Time Emmy on her mantle.  Apparently that’s considered a short, gimmicky career if you happen to be fat.

And regardless of how you might feel about Governor Chris Christie’s politics, here’s a guy who’s had a hard time in the public eye.  Apparently being a governor who has done yeoman’s work in helping rebuild New Jersey in the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy is not enough to quiet the noise about his weight.  Christie faced criticism from Former White House physician Connie Mariano who recently told  CNN that she’s worried Christie might die in office were he elected president.  When Christie pointed out that Mariano has never examined him or his medical records and therefore has nothing upon which to base this prediction, a wave of sympathy was unleashed–towards the doctor.  Mariano responded to Christie’s criticism asking whether he is acting presidential.  However, it doesn’t look like anybody is asking whether Mariano is acting like a real doctor by diagnosing a person based on the way he looks in a suit on TV.

So what happens when you are a talented fat person, taking those first tentative steps towards sharing your gifts with the world and you are confronted with these stories?  Does it help you feel more courageous?  Are you eager to be creative and make yourself vulnerable in a world like this?

I have no doubt that there are millions and millions of deeply creative people in the world who happen to be fat.  But in this climate, in this environment, I think it’s a wonder any of us step out into the light.  Even those of us who have had tremendous success face constant criticism for our size. We are constantly dismissed because we don’t fit an exceptionally narrow standard of beauty.  And so we learn, at a very young age to keep our talents to ourselves, to hide our light under a bushel basket, to be quiet, to be small.  And many of us, for fear of being laughed at, may not even try.  We may not dance.  We may not sing.  We may not even speak.

I wonder what we can do to help encourage the young people around us.  It’s a tough world out there filled will bullies.  Are there kids around us that we can nurture?  Can we help the kids around us learn to reach deep inside in this world filled with hate and give it all they’ve got? Can we encourage them to lift their lights out of the bushel baskets and let them shine?  We can, if we only have the courage to try.

Love,

The Fat Chick