kids | | Page 3

Today I was privileged to read this powerful post from a woman speaking about how she chose to call herself beautiful in front of her daughters. She understands the power of claiming, unconditionally, that she is beautiful in front of her kids. She spoke of how it must have seemed confusing for her young offspring in the past, when they thought her beautiful, but she negated that reality.

She says:

How confusing it must have been to have me say to them, “You think I am beautiful, but you are wrong. You are small and you love me, so you’re not smart enough to know how unattractive I am. I know I am ugly because I see myself with mean eyes. You are my child and I love you, but I will not allow myself to be pretty, for you.

What a profound thing this is.–to understand the power we gain not only for ourselves, but also for all who love us, when we claim our power to be beautiful. When we cast false modesty aside and inhabit our glorious, gorgeous selves we do more than make ourselves feel better. We also create space for others to feel beautiful. We wrest control from media outlets and glossy glamour magazines, over the definition of fabulous. We teach our children that beauty comes in an unending variety of sizes, shapes, colors and types. We cast aside the fear that we will never again be worthy of adoration–that we will never again be enough to make someone gasp at our audacity and amazing selves. And we prevent that fear from tainting the lives of our children. We own the definition of ravishing and rapturous and we choose to apply it to ourselves. And once we’ve applied those labels to ourselves, who would dare, WHO WOULD DARE take it from us?

I find this concept endlessly exciting. The notion that claiming our power encourages other women to do the same. And that making acceptance of ourselves unconditional before our children, we teach them to love themselves forever, rather than for the short time they are young, thin, unblemished, untarnished and inexperienced. What a spectacular and lasting legacy!

So my dear friends. What would happen for you if you cast off the need to be modest and demure? How profound is the impact of accepting yourself unconditionally and forever, just as you are? And just how large is the gift to those who come behind, when you model this calm, confident and peaceful contentment on a day to day basis?

Love thyself, and change the world!

Love,

The Fat Chick

This last weekend I participated in an activism event at Huntington Beach called Take Back the Beach. The event was a coming together of a number of size acceptance groups including the newly formed Size Diversity Task Force. The event was full of fun for people of all shapes and sizes including a Hot Flash Mob for Menopause Awareness Month (video coming soon), a Flesh Mob (pictured above and led by national dance champion Ragen Chastain), a weenie roast, body surfing, sand, s’mores and well, more. The weather was perfect, and I think we all had a wonderful time.

The event was fun and wonderful and powerful. I have to admit however, that the event didn’t match the picture in my mind for a “stereotypical activism event”. We didn’t march. We didn’t chant or shout. We didn’t camp out in tents or form human chains. We simply put on our swimsuits and sunglasses, grabbed our “Know Fat Chicks” towels, slathered on sunscreen and relaxed.

But in a quiet and gentle way, activism happened. People saw how much fun we were having and asked what we were up to. Some people came by to say that they loved our energy. Some little kids adopted us for a while and asked questions and spent time with us. We danced in our swimsuits on the sand and on the boardwalk. We smiled. We laughed. And we didn’t apologize.

Sure, there were stares. For the most part, we met those stares with smiles and openness. And by just getting together and relaxing and sharing our joy and baring some skin we made the beach a brighter and warmer place.

And it made me think of how we are activists when we are fully and deeply ourselves. Feeling comfortable in our skins and sharing our joy is an act of quiet and peaceful rebellion that ripples out and radiates like a big round stone dropped in a quiet pond. Being open and inviting to those who stare at us is a shot across the bow for those who would categorize and stigmatize. And just being there created a precedent for others who have been too afraid to feel the sun on their skin.

So my dear Chicklettes, I’d like to invite you to be an activist. Whether it’s joining the new task force or putting on a swimsuit and dancing at the beach or marching with a sign or simply returning a stare with a smile, I invite you to reach out. Stretch. Shine. The world is better with you in it. So fully inhabit the planet with all of your awesomeness!

Love,

The Fat Chick