Category Archives: Uncategorized

Thursday Theater: Learning the Menopause Mambo


Hello my dear Chicklettes,

Today, I’d like to present to you, the Menopause Mambo.  This VERY easy dance is what we’re doing at our Hot Flash Mobs around the country (and the world).  It’s only 4 different steps and the song is less than three minutes long.  And, oh yeah, it’s super fun!

The Hot Flash Mobs are to celebrate Menopause Awareness Month (September) and World Menopause Day (October 18).  Rather than seeing menopause and perimenopause as something to be dreaded, Dr. Eve Agee and I came up with The Hot Flash Mobs as a way to appreciate this new time of creativity and power in a woman’s life and to demonstrate the amazing power of women getting together, supporting one another and having a really good time.

Flash mobs are forming in New York City, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Fayatteville, Arkansas and Chicago.  Plus, you can start a flash mob of your very own, wherever you live!  Just learn the dance, gather some friends and a video recorder (or cell phone that records video) and preserve your collective awesomeness for posterity!

So get out there and shake your tail feathers!

Love,

The Fat Chick

The Hot Flash Mob is Comin’ to Town!

Well we’ve been working feverishly behind the scenes and I’m so excited to reveal our new Hot Flash Mob Movement, a worldwide, synchronized dance flash mob movement held to honor perimenopausal and menopausal women everywhere.  We’ll be kicking things off in the month of September in honor of Menopause Awareness Month.

This movement was the brainchild of  me: (certified fitness professional, Jeanette DePatie AKA The Fat Chick) and menopause expert dear friend Dr. Eve Agee.

Frustrated by the negative and fear-mongering approach to menopause in our society we asked this question:

“What if instead of fearing menopause, we threw a great big party to celebrate it?”

That’s why we dreamed up the notion of The Hot Flash Mob Movement, a series of spontaneous, hot, group dance experiences allowing women from around the world to get together, have a big laugh and shake their collective groove things.  Our first annual Hot Flash Mobs will be starting very soon.  So hop on over to the website to learn all about it.

Love,

The Fat Chick

You Can’t Buy Fitness: Why Buying Lots of Stuff Won’t Get you Fit

How much did you spend on that device for hanging laundry?

How many of you out there started a fitness program by buying something expensive like a big piece of exercise equipment or a long-term plan at the gym?  And how often did you think, “If I paid all this money for it, I’ll surely stick with it!”?  Did ya think feeling guilty about your purchase would make you work out?  Did it work?  Or do you have an extremely fancy place to hang fine washables otherwise known as a treadmill?

Look, I myself have gone down this path many times.  And it has failed me many times.  Because there is a very annoyed little kid inside me that resents being coerced into exercise based on guilt.  And she rebels.  That kids says, “No way!  I ain’t gonna play!”

This cycle of spending money, feeling guilty about spending money, trying to use that guilt to fuel an exercise routine, not exercising and feeling extremely mad at myself went on for a long time in my life.  In fact, I had to declare a moratorium in order to stop the cycle.   I can remember for a period of two years here in Los Angeles, I took a moderately-priced and absolutely fantastic dance class.  You could for the classes one at a time, or pay in groups of 10 or 30 classes.  Of course the more classes you bought at one time, the cheaper the class was.  One day, the teacher finally asked me, “Why do you not buy a group pass, when you come week after week?”  I finally admitted, “You know, I think I come week after week because I never bought a group pass.”  Yup, this was a cheap Jedi mind trick, but it worked for me.  I went to that class two or three times every week for nearly two years.

I think this is because handing the money over for each class allowed it to feel like a treat.  I had saved up for that class and was lucky to get to dance rather than fulfilling an obligation.  It may seem crazy that I went through all of that and paid extra money because I couldn’t get my inner kid to stop pouting over my previous and devious attempts to fuel exercise with money.  But that kid pouts to this day.  And I still pay for exercise options a little at a time.

Now that I teach exercise and sell books and DVDs and sell training, of course I’d love for people to make big investments in exercise.  But I really just want people to work out and learn to love their bodies and love exercise again.  And I’d rather that folks just buy a book and then read it or buy a DVD and then watch it, than have them buy a gabillion dollars worth of my stuff and never use it.

So my little chicklettes, I’m encouraging you to dip your toe in the water.  Try before you buy.  Just buy one book or one DVD.  Buy one week of training or consulting.  Find a gym that doesn’t penalize you too heavily for paying weekly or monthly.  Because working out is not an obligation to be dreaded, but a very special treat.

Love,

The Fat Chick

Smart Enough to Laugh at Myself?

The other day I saw this picture and I laughed out loud. I mean clearly this is a picture of a smart dude. This guy is one of the greatest theoretical scientists like, ever. There is no doubt that his contribution to science is epic. But here he is wearing big, fluffy, fuzzy slippers and clearly having a bit of a laugh about himself. And I thought, yup Einstein was a smart guy. He was even smart enough to laugh at himself.

And it made me think. I used to laugh at myself all the time. I used to wear big floppy hats in public and sing out loud in convertibles and dance on the sidewalk and wear men’s clothing sometimes just for the heck of it. I dared the universe to look at me funny. I just did what I felt like and told the world they could like it or lump it.

But somewhere along the way, I think I got a little too serious about myself. I started worrying a lot more about what people might think of me. I bought nice clothes—sometimes because I liked them, but also as protective coloring to allow me to blend in. I got quieter and smaller. I tried to be less a target.

But now, as I get older, I’ve gotten bolder. I’ve got pictures of me in feather boas with the words “The Fat Chick” underneath. I wear purple. I smile big. I dance in public. Because I’m learning again not to take myself quite so seriously. I’m relearning how to laugh at myself.

So my little chicklettes, I dare you to do something loud and crazy and goofy today! Put on a big floppy hat. Sing out loud in a convertible with the top down. Dance on the beach. Weave flowers in your hair. Feel the freedom of having a little giggle at yourself.

Love,

The Fat Chick

Stuff that Weighs More than Me: Blue Whale Tongue

I’m sure you could guess that a whale weighs more than me.  I mean whales are BIG.  I mean REALLY big.  But what you might not know is that the whale is the big mouth of the sea.  Seriously.  Whales need big mouths to eat their very big dinners.  During the high feeding season, a whale will consume 4-6 tons of teeny tiny krill per day.  In order to do so, their throats expand to take in as much as 50 tons of water in one gulp!

The blue whale is also the loudest creature on earth.  Blue whale song can reach 188 decibels.  For comparison’s sake, a jet engine on takeoff is about 140 decibels and the human pain threshold is 120 decibels.   Luckily the whale’s song doesn’t hurt the ears of other underwater animals who have ears that can tolerate such high amplitude. The song of a blue whale can be heard up to 500 miles away.

And then we have the blue whale’s tongue.  This thing is massive y’all.  Here’s the stats:

Estimated length: 19 ft.

Estimated area: Large enough for 50 people to stand upon it.

Estimated Weight: About 4 tons

Conclusion: A whale’s tongue weighs more than me.

 

Fine Dining Doesn’t Come Through the Window

In the name of true confessions, I eat in my car more than I would like.  I am really struggling to schedule my life a little less tightly so that I am not so tempted to just grab something to eat on the way to somewhere.  Because from the standpoint of being way overscheduled and experiencing multitasking run amok, the drive-thru is awesome.  From the standpoint of health, happiness, joy, wellness and having the remotest chance of actually enjoying my food, not so much really.

Now, I don’t want to dis drive thru dining if that floats your boat.  If you’re a consenting a-dult, you get to make your own choices.  I just know that eating drive thru while negotiating 80 MPH LA traffic which is randomly punctuated with 2 MPH LA traffic (encompassing both fast food and slow food in the same journey) is not conducive to good digestion.  And since eating can be a super-awesome pleasurable thing, it’s sad to see it reduced to a situation where I can’t enjoy it or focus on it.  Drive thru dining does not always offer the healthiest food options.  And the recent McDonalds apple slice recall is making me reluctant to order anything that hasn’t been cooked until it is well and truly dead.

So my little chickadees.  If drive through dining rocks your world, by all means, go to it.  But if it’s simply a matter of needing to prioritize joyful eating in your life, then I’d like to invite you to get up a few minutes earlier, drive a few minutes further and take a few minutes longer so you can sit down at a table, tuck your napkin under your chin, and really savor the tastes that life has to offer.
Love,

The Fat Chick

 

What Everybody Knows

I got yet another comment on the video of Julianne and I on Fox News as posted on my YouTube channel congratulating us for saying that plus-sized people should feel good about ourselves, and then chastising us for saying that fat can be healthy when “everyone knows” that fat can’t be healthy.

I replied, “please review some of the evidence listed below refuting the idea that everyone knows fat is unhealthy”.  You see, somebody had started an argument earlier on the very same thread about the very same thing and a lot of size acceptance folks (including me) posted links to scientific studies that indicate fat people can be and often are healthy.

Within just a few short minutes of my reply, the poster withdrew her comment from my channel.  I’m not sure what to make of this.  Did the poster change their mind?  Did the poster just not want to argue?  Were they embarrassed?  I’m just not sure.

I do know this.  I hear this “everyone knows fat people can’t be healthy” argument a lot.  And when I say a lot, I mean a lot.  But just because someone says the earth is flat doesn’t mean I have to believe it.  Just because somebody points to the horizon and asserts that I will fall off the edge of the world, doesn’t mean I can’t get in my boat and go sailing.

It can be hard to argue with folks who bring up the “everybody knows fat people can’t be healthy” argument.  Sometimes it seems like there aren’t enough sanity points in the whole world to deal with this nonsense yet again.  But maybe the best way to deal with the fallacies that “everyone knows” to be true is to stand up and say, “Not me!  I don’t agree, and here’s why.”  Because throughout history, “everybody has known” one lie or another to be true, until enough people stood up and said “Not me.  I don’t believe it.”  Or at the very least, some people stood up and said, “Oh yeah?  Prove it!”

My dear chicklettes, don’t allow yourselves to be bullied by what “everyone knows”.  Get your hands on the facts.  Do the research.   And don’t allow yourselves to be stressed out by arguments from those too lazy to actually support what they are saying with statistics or numbers or citations.  Because what I know is that you are awesome and deserving of respect.

Love,

The Fat Chick

Tuesday Theater: How to Deal with Hair Haters

Okay, this after all the recent hair debate, this is seriously, seriously awesome. That is all.

Enjoy!

Love,
The Fat Chick

Baggy

Wear what feels good to YOU!

Well it was hot in So Cal this past weekend so I did what every single other red-blooded California resident did and I went to the mall.  I wasn’t really intent on shopping but rather on killing loads of time.  So I went to lots of stores and tried lots of stuff on.  My husband was with me, so naturally he rendered his opinions.

Often as I tried things on, he sent me back to the dressing room with a smaller size.  It’s not that I’m losing weight (I’m not).  It’s just that my renewed body confidence and my supportive husband are encouraging me to come out of the fat closet and wear clothes that actually fit.  Many of the clothes in my closet at home are gorgeous, but at least one size too big.  Often when I try something on that I love, if it shows even a leetle roll or jiggle or chub, I buy one size larger.  A lot of the clothes in my wardrobe hang on me.  Because, somehow, in my little brain, I imagined that if folks couldn’t SEE the rolls or chub or jiggle, they would imagine that it wasn’t there.

Trouble was, they can’t really see my body at all.  And I’m coming to realize that my body is FABULOUS and it’s simply a crime to hide it under a big drape-y thing that is far too large for my frame.  So I’m actively working now to buy clothes that show my body rather than draping it under the wardrobe equivalent of a sheet and hoping that folks imagine my body is fantastic.

Now my little chickadees, I want you to understand that you can wear anything you like.  If you want to wear a muumuu, then by all means do so and feel free to ROCK that thing.  I’m just reminding you that you have a choice.  Maybe you could dare to bare just a little bit.  Show some arms.  Buy a skirt that curves lovingly around your butt.  Wear a shirt that shows off some fantastic cleavage.  Whatever floats your proverbial boat.  Because it’s your fabulous body and you should show it off (or not show it off) any way you darn well please!

Love,

The Fat Chick

Some Athletes are Notably Missing from NBC’s Creepy Bodies in Motion Video

An Olympian woman licks her lips accompanied by a boom chicka wow wow 70’s soft porn soundtrack in NBC’s Bodies in Motion clip on the NBC website.

I’ve admitted it before and I’ll admit it again.  I am complete Olympics junkie.  I LOVE watching the Olympics and cheering for people who have devoted a serious percentage of their lives to be incredibly good at something.  But I have to admit how sad and disappointed I’ve been with the NBC coverage which seems intent on objectifying women and shows a ridiculous fetish-y need to show off the rear ends of incredibly talented women athletes.

First, there was the concern over the London weather being too cold for the beach volleyball players to wear their bikinis.  Then there was the uproar over Gabby Douglas’ hair.  And if that wasn’t enough, NBC felt the need to post a totally inappropriate video called “Bodies in Motion” that along with it’s 70’s soft porn style soundtrack featured a whole lot of women’s bodies, often without faces, in loving slow motion that featured, a lot of women’s butts.  Not that Olympic booty isn’t wonderful.  But seriously, these women train hard every day of their lives to be excellent at their sport.  So why oh why do we need frame-filling close-ups of beach volley-butts?

Probably most distressing to me about this video is who ISN’T in the video.  Weight lifters?  Nope.  Boxers?  Uh-uh.  Fencers, Judo Competitors, rowers, horseback riders, in short anything where women sport bodies considered slightly less movie-star-ready or wearing slightly more clothing?  No, no, no, no and no.

And what really frosts my fridge is the effect that this desire for conventionally attractive bodies has on sponsorship dollars for women athletes.  Sure if you’re gorgeous, blond, bouncy, ponytailed and razor thin, money can often be found.  Meanwhile serious athletes like Sarah Robles often have to get by on a few hundred dollars per month and help from neighborhood food banks.

Let’s face it, not all athletes look like porn stars.  Not all of them were considered worthy to star NBC’s soft porn video (which has since been pulled due to public outcry).  Nope, lots of athletes look just like you and me.  And nearly 1,000 of them participate in the fit fatties forum that I host with the ever-awesome Ragen Chastain.

So my little chicklettes, even if your rear-end is not bikini-clad or featured in barely safe for work fetish videos, don’t despair.  Remember that fitness comes in all shapes and sizes.

Love,

The Fat Chick