Tag Archives: sharing

On the Power of Sisterhood

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I went to an event called TEDx Pasadena Women last night and it was amazing.  I don’t know why I am still sometimes surprised after all these years about the power of women and the power of sisterhood.  I’ve had decades of experience that tell me that when I a group of women get together, something powerful happens.  There are rare exceptions.  Events that don’t have the amazing zap and snap of the one I went to last night.  But honestly, those are the exceptions that prove the rule.

I had an amazing time meeting women of all types last night who do all different things.  From powerful television producers with Emmy-winning hit shows to women helping other young women build self-esteem to real estate moguls who also help victims of domestic violence, these formidable females get stuff done.

But they are also deeply interested in what stuff OTHER women are getting done.  And that is a key to their power.  They are deeply accomplished, but still want to hear what other women have to say.  And then they take a moment, and thoughtfully consider who else you should connect with, and walk you over there and introduce you.  It’s freaking amazing.

That’s not to say that male-dominated events don’t have good things about them.  There’s good (and bad) things about virtually every event.  But I’m telling you, events dominated by men are different.  And I meet more people and get more business done and connect more and make more happen in events dominated by women.  Especially, ESPECIALLY if those women’s events are diverse in other ways like race, age, socioeconomic status, sexual orientation, religion and background.

So if you are a woman (as I know many of you my dear readers are) I can’t recommend highly enough that you find a moment to inject some sisterhood into your life.  Find some time on the regular to meet and connect with more women.  It will do you good.

And don’t (as I often do) forget to stop talking once in a while and start listening.  I think you’ll find your sisters have some pretty amazing things to share.

Love,

Jeanette DePatie

AKA The Fat Chick

P.S. Speaking of sharing.  I hope you’ve gone over and registered for The Fat Activism Conference.  We have dozens of amazing women ready to share their stuff for your open ears.  Prices will go up again soon, so click on over HERE.

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Speaking With My Sisters

Yesterday I had the honor and privilege of speaking as a panelist at Digital Hollywood on a panel hosted by the Alliance for Women in Media.  It was a part of a track of women’s programming hosted by the Alliance along with Women In Film, Women Network, and Girls In Tech Los Angeles.  Throughout the day there were panels and screenings and networking events presented by women for women, and it was glorious.

There is nothing quite like hanging out in a room with several hundred powerful women who are following their path and living in their power.  There was a lot of discussion of lifting one another up.  We talked about the new economy approach of focusing less on competition and a whole lot more on collaboration.  We talked about our dreams and inspired one another.

The evening ended with a powerful (and wildly entertaining speech) by Michelle Patterson, President of the California Women’s Conference & Women Network.  The speech touched me in a number of ways, but one thing stood out in particular.  Michelle reminds us, that if we are to succeed, we must learn to ask for help and also learn to receive that help.  I think for many of us, this is a particularly difficult lesson.  We aren’t comfortable asking.  We think we shouldn’t need help or that we don’t deserve help.  Or we just can’t imagine how someone might help us.  But all of us need help from time to time.  And this was a really important reminder for me–that asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness.  If you are convinced you can accomplish all your dreams without help, you are either naive or simply not dreaming big enough.  Because big dreams require big, beautiful, powerful teams to accomplish them.

But throughout this day, I learned another equally important lesson.  Don’t assume you don’t have the ability to help.  I went to many panels.  And like many people around me, I rushed up to the podium afterwards to speak with the panelists with whom I resonated.  I connected with panelists that I thought might be able to help me.  And I asked for help.  I also wanted to offer help.  But initially, I was hampered by the belief that I wouldn’t be able to help.  Some of these women were CEO’s of very large companies.  Some of them were successful screen writers or famous actresses or technology mavens.  I wondered what I could possibly offer.  But then I decided to take a different tack.  I chose not to believe there was nothing for me to give and I simply asked.  What is the one problem you are trying to solve right now?  What do you need?  Can  I connect you with somebody?  How can I help?  And it was magic.  Many of the panelists were taken aback when I asked.  They stopped, and thanked me for asking.  And then they told me what they needed.  And you know what was amazing.  In many cases I WAS able to help.  I couldn’t necessarily do the things myself, but I knew somebody who could.  I gave out names and offered to make introductions.  And I felt powerful.  It was good.

So that was my lesson from yesterday.  Never assume you are not worthy of help.  Believe in your self and your passion enough to dare to simply ask for what you need.  Be direct.  You’ll be surprised how often people will give you what you ask.  And never assume you are not worthy to give help.  You never know what you have to offer someone or how you can connect with others if you don’t ask them what they need.  Even if you can’t help, asking someone what they need is a profound way to honor them.

So, I’m asking.  Right now, I particularly need to find speaking gigs.  I am working on an important speaking certification and need to get 20 more speeches in before the end of the year.  With that in mind, I’m offering a special “gotta get 20 speeches” discount.  There will never be a better time to book me to speak with your group.  Don’t assume you can’t afford me, because I gotta do 20 speeches.  Can  you book me?  Or do you know somebody who can book me?  Just send me an email at jeanette at the fat chick dot com and let me know what you’re thinking.

And I’m asking.  What do you need right now?  Can I connect you with somebody to help you with a particular thing?  What is standing in your way of reaching your goal?  How can I help?  Again, feel free to comment or send me an email.

What can I say?  Yesterday was a very good day.  And I believe today can truly be phenomenal for all of us.

Love,

Jeanette DePatie (AKA The Fat Chick)

ROUND numbers: Fit Fatties Forum nears 1,000!

Hello kids!  Sorry for the semi-demi-advertisement here, but I just realized that we are only one even dozen members away from hitting 1,000 on the Fit Fatties forum.  Now I admit, I’ve been pretty distracted getting ready for today’s Bi-coastal Hot Flash Mob (woo-hoo!) and hadn’t realized that we were quite so close to achieving this nice large and ROUND number.  Wanna help?  Let’s get there today!  1,000th member gets a copy of my DVD The Fat Chick Works Out!  Even if you’re a beginning exerciser.  Even if you’re just thinking about starting to think about exercise, you’re welcome on the Fit Fatties Forum.  And you’ll be surrounded by a supportive, loving community that can’t wait to answer your questions and rock out with you!

So join already.  Upload a picture.  Share your general awesomeness!  And if you’re already a member, share with your friends!
Love,

The Fat Chick

The Power of a Few Kind Words

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Over the weeks and months that I’ve been writing this blog, a number of you have left nice messages in the comments.  I wonder if you realize the impact you have?  Do you know how just a few kind words can be enough to make my whole day?  They make me feel important.  They make me feel appreciated.

So many of us walk around in our lives feeling unappreciated.  We feel like nobody notices what we do.  Our hearts are heavy with the thought that no one understands what we are going through.  But do you realize what power you have to change that for those around you?  Do you see how just saying sincere thanks to people in your lives, from the woman at the Drive Thru at the bank to your best friend, to your mom, to your spouse can have an impact on them?  And do you know what an impact it can have on you?

When you sincerely thank those around you, when you applaud them for the work they do, when you allow them to see that their efforts matter to someone, they feel good and you feel good.  It’s a two-fer one deal.  Now let me be clear.  This is something I really wish I was better at doing.  With my staunch Midwestern upbringing, it’s easy for me to politely thank perfect strangers, while at the same time be kind of lousy at thanking and encouraging those closest to me.  I get busy.  I forget.  I don’t like to gush.

But when I look around me at the people who are most successful and the most happy, they are also the people most encouraging to those around them.  So I am trying to be better.   I am trying to get my head out of my proverbial butt a little more.  And I am trying to verbalize what I am often thinking: how blessed I am to have smart, loving, joyful, generous, kind and awesome people in my life.  I’m trying to remember to say thanks.

So my little chicklettes, you are indeed truly awesome!  And thanks so much for listening.

Love,

The Fat Chick