Tag Archives: academy awards

And the Award for Best at Wearing a Dress Goes to…


Long before the final statuettes have been given out, the awards for who looks best (and worst) in a dress are being decided.  From the moment these film actors and actresses stop onto the red carpet, the world is frantically deciding, do they look good?  Isn’t it interesting that the Oscar is almost a secondary award to the main award–the best and worst dress lists?  These lists begin to come out before the first Academy Award envelope is opened and before the stars and starlets have even had a chance to find a drink or have their first, post-red-carpet pee.

Anybody who has any doubts about the priorities of our culture need look no further than this night.  Winning for being the best actor or actress often simply takes second place to who wore the best dress, had the right hair, and managed to score the most exclusive awards night jewelry.  Even the directors, producers, costume designers, writers, set designers, sound designers and more are meticulously dissected based on hem length, cleavage, tux tailoring, strappy shoe wearing and bling.

I can’t help thinking that it all feels so “High School”.  The pecking order for the most prestigious film awards in the world seems to share more than a little in common with your average High School prom evening.  You have the popular kids, the AV nerds, the smart kids, the jocks, the goth kids and others.   You have limo rides that are probably more awkward than fun.  You have folks who have poured more money into one evening that anyone ever thought prudent or even possible.  And at the end of the day, it seems all anyone cares, is how they looked in the dress.


Maybe that’s why, despite multiple invitations to various Oscar parties, I opted to simply go to the pub with my sweetie.  I ate sliders.  I wore jeans.  I drank wine.  Life is good.

So maybe I won’t win the award for best at wearing a dress.  But at least I had a good time.  Oh, and I didn’t have to wait three hours to pee either.

I guess it’s all about priorities.


The Fat Chick

Stuff That Weighs More than Me: Oscars Night Red Carpet


Sporting my black dress at the Producers Guild Awards

It’s getting close to that time again.  The Oscars are nearly upon us and you can’t spit in Hollywood these days without hitting an awards show or two.  So it got me thinking.  Just how much does that red carpet weigh?  Yup, that’s the kind of stuff I think about these days.  So I set out on a mission to find out.

First I had to figure out how big the Oscars red carpet is.  The answer is, it’s HUGE!  Check out this photo from Google maps:


That’s a loooong walk in 4-inch heels.  My research tells me that the Oscars red carpet which takes a large chunk of Hollywood Boulevard measures 33 feet wide and over 500 feet long!  That’s 16,500 square feet of carpet!  Apparently the rental cost on this much red carpet could range between $20,000 and $30,000 once service and maintenance fees are taken into account.  (That’s not counting the cleaning bill.  And somehow I don’t think renting a Rug Doctor machine from the local grocery store is gonna cut it.)

Estimates for the weight of carpet are all over the map.  But the most consistent guess I saw puts the weight at about 5 pounds per square yard.  So let’s do the math:

Rug Area (in feet) 16,500

Rug Area (in yards) 1,834

Carpet Weight (in pounds) 9,170

Conclusion while many of the starlets on it may not, the red carpet at the Oscars weighs more than me.

P.S. Be sure to enter your miles or minutes at Fit Fatties Across America before noon today in order to count towards this week’s goals.  Let’s get out of Colorado people!

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