One of the simplest ways I’ve found for coping with panic is to formulate a plan.  Often this plan starts with something as simple as a piece of paper, a pen and 15 minutes to write a to-do list.  I have been blessed enough to be very, very busy over the past few months.  And while I am definitely NOT complaining, there have been times where I became somewhat overwhelmed with the volume of producing, writing, business and family projects I was juggling.  And by “overwhelmed” I mean crying hysterically and screaming at my husband to hurry up with the D@#@#$N paper bag for me to breathe into.  And when that happened, I found it most helpful to follow the “steps for coping with panic” pretty much as I’ve been outlining them for you:

1.  Recognizing I’m in panic mode.  (Often facilitated by my husband sheepishly peeking around a corner and asking, “are we in a panic then?” and ducking before the frying pan, encyclopedia or office chair could hit him in the head.)
2.  Doing something physical to blow off some of the adrenalin.  Either teaching an aerobics class, or walking around the block or chasing the dog.
3.  Taking a quiet moment to stop, and take a deep breath so I could think properly.
and then
4.  Taking out a piece of paper and a pencil and writing a to-do list.

Sometimes the list in itself is a little overwhelming.  I had one list before Christmas that got to 43 items that I wanted to do before I left town the next day.  Naturally I had to trim a few things off the list.  And 43 items due the next day is like, um, YIKES!  But somehow writing everything down always helps.  The to-do list is just a beginning step to formulating a plan.  You can manage, prioritize and execute the list a little bit later on.  But somehow knowing what the drama is, in black and white, always seems to calm me down and I think it will help you to.

A to-do list isn’t just about errands.  A to-do list can also apply to life situations that cause you to panic.  So if you’re feeling panic-stricken about your weight (or anything else), take out a piece of paper and a pencil and make a to-do list about all the things you think you should do about it.  Don’t worry if these things are attainable or logical or reasonable at this point.  Just write down every crazy idea you have about what you should do about your weight (or whatever is bothering you).  Then fold the list up and put it away until tomorrow.  We’ll deal with it then.  Happy list making…

Love,
The Fat Chick

One of the first things that happens when we panic is that our brain rushes to and prepares for the worst case scenario without an accurate assessment of whether or not the worst will happen.  This is why when many of us panic, we worry that we will be as big as a house or at least an elephant if we don’t do something RIGHT NOW.  Given the size of a house or an elephant, this isn’t likely, but we worry nonetheless.

I have talked to many, many people who struggle with their weight, and this worry seems to be fairly universal.

However, it is my experience that our bodies have a built in system for regulation that does a pretty good job of keeping us within a certain weight range.  Once I stopped dieting and simply focused on getting regular exercise and eating food that is both pleasurable and nourishing to my body, I lost about ten pounds and pretty much stayed there.  Contrary to all popular wisdom, I didn’t keep gaining weight.  I didn’t “balloon up”, or grow “big as a house”.  And lest you believe this experience is unique to me, there is quite a bit of science to back up this idea.

Most of us, tend to stay within a 10-20 pound range that is normal for us.  This “normal” weight may be thin, average or heavy, and is influenced by a variety of factors (the most important of which is heredity but may also include culture, psychology, habits and many other factors).  In any case, to stray significantly from our “average” range is a lot of work for most of us.  That’s why significant weight loss tends to be fleeting.  And that’s why once we each reach our personal “normal” weight, we don’t tend to get too much heavier.   This scientific concept is called “set point”

Please note that this is not true in every single case.  There are always exceptions–especially when specific medical and metabolic disorders are involved.  But the vast majority of us tend to hover around a specific weight range unless we diet very dramatically, or overeat very dramatically.  It’s also important to note that some people who have a “normal” weight that is far above what the height weight charts say they should be, are not eating any more that those in the “thin range” in the charts.  No matter how much folks in the “thin range” lord it over the larger folks, saying they are thin because of their morally superior engagement in healthy behaviors, their behavior may be identical to a naturally heavy person in the “higher range” of the charts.

I know.  You’re saying–yeah, right.  She just wants to make excuses for eating chocolate chip cookies.  What does she know?  And if you’re saying that–good.  It means your rational mind is starting to creep back, and you’re beginning to make evaluations based on logic instead of just believing what people tell you.  So in order to feed your logical mind, here are some links to some articles that will give you “food for thought”.

A nice PDF about set point from MIT Medical.
A Brief about a prison study demonstrating set point.

There is a very good section regarding this topic in Gina Kolata’s Book

While not everybody agrees with every element of set point theory, most agree that going on a wildly restricted, low-calorie plan will result in short-term weight loss, at best.  And chances are, if you take 15 minutes or even a day or two to think things over, your weight will stay pretty much the same.

This is a very important fact to keep in mind as you are facing screaming, hysterical panic about your weight.  Because, when you are facing this panic, it’s most important to stop, take a deep breath and deal with the panic FIRST before you take any action regarding your weight.  Wait.  Breathe.  Study.  Contemplate.  Take a walk as I suggested yesterday.  For heaven’s sake, gather some facts before you go on the next all meat, all grapefruit, all cabbage diet or stop eating all together, or take some unregulated metabolism enhancing herbal supplement or barely regulated new weight loss wonder drug, or get a major, life altering surgery.

Just wait a minute, why don’t you?  Take a deep breath and consider  your options.  Let your rational mind consider your next move and let your panic-filled lizard brain have a rest.  You’ll be glad you did.

Love,
The Fat Chick

How big is the Average American House?

The Formula:  
The basic ratio of square footage to weight for a home is 2000 pounds or 1 ton per square foot of floor space. This estimate takes into consideration the contents within the floor space but does not include the weight of the foundation. All you need to do is multiply the square footage by 1 ton.

According to the National Association of Home Builders, the average home size in the United States was 2,330 square feet in 2004, up from 1,400 square feet in 1970.

So the average American home weighs about 2,330 tons.

Conclusion:  The Average American home weighs more than me.

Object: Windmill Tower outside of Palm Springs, CA
Height: Up to 300 ft.
Weight: The compartments at the top containing the generator, hub and gearbox weigh 30,000 to 45,000 pounds.

Conclusion: A Palm Springs Windmill weighs more than me.

When we are in panic mode, our bodies are urgently prepared for fight or flight.  And while you may be tempted to fight–especially if there’s some dunderhead that made some stupid comment about your weight that got this whole panic thing started, that’s rarely a sensible course.

Actual flight is probably not a resonable course either.  (At least, I find most conditions that cause me to be airborne don’t end well).  But a simple walk away from the trigger or just for the sake of walking can be a very useful initial coping technique.

In order to move beyond the initial mental cloudiness of panic, we’ve got to get some of that adrenaline out of our systems.  And one of the fastest, safest and most productive ways to do this is to take a little walk.  (Sex is great too, but I personally don’t feel very amorous in the middle of this type of situation).  Just put on some tennis shoes or other comfortable footwear and head out the door.  Spend a little of that energy getting away by yourself and breathing deeply.  If you can walk safely outside, this is best.  The fresh air will help you.  But even if you can’t walk outside, just take your fear and your panic and take a little hike.  Walk fast at first, and then allow your walking and your breathing and your mind to slow down.  This allows your adrenalin to do something useful instead of just being stored in your body.  It allows your body to do what you primed it all up to do in a safe and healthy environment. 

So  next time you feel like the world is about to end, lace up your shoes and head out yonder.  You’ll feel better, I promise.

Love,
The Fat Chick

Steinway Model D Grand Piano
Introduced in: 1884
Available in: Mahogany, Walnut, Rosewood & Ebony
Length: 8′ 10 3/4”
Width: 4′ 6”
Weight: 990 lbs 

Conclusion: A Steinway Model D Grand Piano weighs more than me.

On New Years Day we talked a little bit about the big fat cycle.  That 4 step circle that we go around and around every so often or every year or once a month.  The cycle (as I define it) starts with panic (OhmyGod, I’m so fat) moves on to fantasy thinking (I’m going to drop 4 dress sizes by Valentines day) Defeat (I’ve only lost 1/2 a pound.  Forget it, I’m eating cookies.  A LOT of cookies) and despair (I’m so lame.  I can’t even stick to this for one week).

Since we’re still pretty close to that magic January 1, New Years Resolution stage, I figured a lot of us are experiencing step one, panic.  Now this panic is very real for many of us.  We’re talking genuine, stay up all night, hyperventilating, I need a paper bag kind of panic.  For some of us, the jeans are a little tighter after all the Christmas cookies, or we’re heading in to see the doctor for our beginning of the year annual physical.  Or many of us just get caught up in the January insanity where all the newspapers and news stories switch seemingly overnight from recipes for chocolate holiday bliss to screaming about America’s expanding waistline.

It’s easy to succumb.  And for many, many years, I did succumb.  But at some point, I finally realized that it didn’t get me anywhere.  It just got me to drop my money and my common sense and sign up for some lose-weight-quick scam.  The reason for this is simple.  Panic is vastly inappropriate to this situation.

Today, we know panic as “ a discrete period of intense fear or discomfort that is accompanied by at least 4 of 13 somatic or cognitive symptoms… often accompanied by a sense of imminent danger or impending doom and an urge to escape…or desire to flee from wherever the attack is occurring.”
American Psychiatric Association. Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th Edition [DSM-IV]. Washington, DC, American Psychiatric Association, 1994, p. 394-403

The symptoms the DSM-IV list are:

1. palpitations, pounding heart, or accelerated heart rate
2. sweating
3. trembling or shaking
4. sensations of shortness of breath or smothering
5. feeling of choking
6. chest pain or discomfort
7. nausea or abdominal distress
8. feeling dizzy, unsteady, lightheaded, or faint
9. derealization (feelings of unreality) or depersonalization (being detached from oneself)
10. fear of losing control or going crazy
11. fear of dying
12. paresthesias (numbness or tingling sensations.
13. chills or hot flushes 

Panic is the body’s way of guiding us towards immediate unconsious action, i.e. fight or flight.  This is very appropriate if an elephant is running full speed on a direct collision course with us.  We don’t have time to think, evaluate the consequences and so forth.  We have to MOVE.  But panic is an inappropriate response to an issue like body weight.  Who are you going to fight?  Genetics?  Your grandma’s chess pie?  The stupid fashion designers who decided that skinny jeans are “in” this year?

And where are you going to run?  The gym?  The nearest “groupthink” weight loss center?  A surgeon’s office for weight loss surgery?

Panic is bad for a few reasons.  It raises blood pressure and bad cholesterol and heart rate and floods adrenaline into our system.  It shuts down blood flow to some areas of our bodies.  And while this is necessary and useful if a huge pachyderm is thundering down the road towards our location, it is not useful and physically dangerous if experienced over a long period of time.

And what’s more, panic reduces our capacity to reason and to think.  It only offers two choices–smackdown or run away.  Neither of which is very useful in this situation.

However much it may seem like it, you didn’t achieve your current body size, shape and weight in a day.  So it won’t hurt to take a little time to calm down and carefully consider what’s best for you.

So how ’bout it?  Get a cup of tea, love and take a deep breath.  We’ll cover the bases, one by one.  But for now, just breathe.

Love,
The Fat Chick

There is little nourishment in the world as important or as satisfying as spending time with a good friend.  Someone to share your joys and your sorrow.  A shoulder to cry on.  A drinking, shopping or eating buddy.  Somebody who will tell you that you have spinach in your teeth and when you need to find a new hairdresser.  Somebody to dare you to wear the bright red dress or the Armani dinner jacket.

I’m so glad that I have so many good and dear friends. And I’m especially lucky to be married to my very best friend of all.  But as much as we ourselves need nourishment, our friendships also need nourishment in order to survive.

Luckily, it’s as satisfying to give as to receive friendship.  Why not take a moment today to do something kind or generous for one of your friends.  Just do it right out of the blue.  I guarantee it will warm YOUR heart and nourish YOUR soul.  Give it a try.

Love,
The Fat Chick

Hummer H1 Alpha
Curb weight: 7847 pounds
Conclusion: A Hummer weighs more than me.

Sometimes there is nothing quite as nourishing as 8 glorious hours of uninterrupted sleep.  After spending the last 4 days working nonstop at a convention for one of my clients, I honestly can’t think of anything better.

Sleep is very important.  It allows your body, mind and spirit to repair normal wear and tear and prepare for the day ahead.  And what’s more, good sleep feels awesome.  I think you should get under the blankies and get some real rest tonight.   I could tell you  a lot more about the philosophy of sleep, but ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Love,
The Fat Chick